I do not know why I feel so hurt. I am supposed to be over her already. But when I saw the guy standing next to her, I felt so insignificant, so helpless, so small. Every day I look in the mirror, I see my worst enemy and how detestable he is. Intelligent yet horridly ugly, arrogant, a misanthrope, a fat lil bastard who cannot do shit even if his life depended on it. My life depends on poetry, and that is full of shit as well. My math skills are horrible, I could not make it into the team. maybe if I did I could have seen her again. My whole life revolved around this girl, and all she did is break my heart again and again. When I saw her look at her boyfriend, I knew I had no chance. My face looks like I got hit by a concorde. I have never been happy. truly happy since I was 11. except when I was with her. I feel so insignificant, I always feel insignificant. Look at me, writing this fucking thing, writing fucking poetry that nobody cares about. I am writing so much of this my friends are wondering if I'm gay. Seriously, I should be over her by now, but how do you take yourself from the only person that has ever made you feel good about yourself? For that brief moment she was in my arms, it seemed like everything was ok. Everything seemed to fall into place, but fell apart as soon as I let go. I miss her so much. I love her so much. My life is miserable, every second of it without her. Who would have thought an intelligent person like me would do such a stupid thing as to fall head over heels for a girl I see only once every 3 years? This is what intelligence does to you. FUCKS YOU OVER. You lose your popularity. for intelligence. What will intelligence give you? Would it give you more money in the future? Nope. Look at the world, are the smart people there at the top? No, they are being used as pawns in a game dominated by idiots. This is the future life of an intellectual: im gonna graduate, not gonna find a job, realize my degree is a piece of shit, go to my MBA, get turned down for the program, forced to find a job (which will be sweeping floors even though i graduate top honours), find a girl i really like who ends up falling in love with my best friend, only girl that wants me is an ugly bitch control freak cuz i dun have any money, and ill marry her cuz she has money, live in complete misery, have 2 kid who'll end up like a piece of shit and yells at me all day and drops out in the 9th grade. The other one will have 7 abortions before she is 18 then I will die penniless and hairless because my wife would take all my money when she cheats on me. This is the life of an intellectual, and I have traded my youth, my childhood, for this bullshit.