5I'm not crying but I'm an emotional wreck
No one's home or awake
At this point everything seems so unreal
How am I ever going to keep up my average
I can sense but I can't feel
how am I ever going to go off to a good college
It may be late but my minds rushing and my heart's pounding
How are my parents going to react?
It's been mouths and I still can't go a day without thinking of you
I can't stop tossing and turning
I have to...
I roll out and stumble down the hall
I can sense the cold kitchen floor
The first real thing I can really feel
I pull out the silver metallic object
That so much rests on
When I can't rest
The sensation on my wrists is a climax then a sigh of relief
Suddenly I'm on a high
A feeling of happiness only being with you can compete with
My worries are no more
Again, just sliding it back and forth
Not deep, just it to feel it
When I can't feel anything physical
Just emotional
Everyone's wrong I'm not going to die
It's hardly a scratch
I don't want anyone to know or ask
But I still find myself going to school with short sleeves
Just to see if anyone notices
I've only done that a few times
No one cares, yet I'm satisfied
I keep to myself
I've never been fond of the sight of blood
Unless it's just a small amount in this situation
I step back and breath, this is enough for now
I take a paper towel and give them pressure for a few minutes
I wont have to worry about you till tomorrow
I think I can sleep now