Shattered Pieces
by P.A. Lovas
A shrill ring shot through the room, and Aaron jumped, dropping the open file in his hands. He shook his head as he stared at the phone, amazed that after all this time, he was still afraid. Afraid of the message that could be on the other end, and of loosing everything all over again.
"Hey, the phone's ringing," Garry said, poking his head into Aaron's office. "All you have to do is pick up that long part over there, and it'll stop."
"Ha ha." Aaron rolled his eyes as he placed the receiver to his ear. "Hello?"
"Aaron?"
"Yeah…"
"It's me."
Aaron sat there for a moment, blinking in confusion. How could this be? "Donovan?"
"Uh huh."
"How'd you get this number?" Aaron leaned back in his chair, trying to figure out when, or if, in fact, he had given Donovan his office number.
"Um…" There was a small, nervous laugh. "I kinda stole one of your business cards from your glove compartment that day you passed out."
"You nosed though my car?"
"Uh…a little bit. And you should probably clean out your glove compartment. It's a mess in there."
"I'll keep that in mind." Aaron shook his head, laughing softly. "So, what's up?" There was a long pause, as Donovan's breathing seemed to shallow, and Aaron sat up abruptly, gripping the receiver with both hands. "Donovan, is everything alright?"
"Huh?" In his mind eye, Aaron could see Donovan pick his head up, blinking. "Oh, yeah. It's, um…it's nothing. Look, I'm sorry I bothered you."
"Wait-" Aaron called, his ears meeting with a small clicking noise. He pulled the phone away, staring at it as his mind reeled. Something was wrong, but what? Was that just his imagination, or did Donovan sound, almost…scared? Should he leave him alone? Should he go to him?
A loud, guttural beeping pulled Aaron from his thoughts as he turned to look at the phone. The noise that emanated from it was foreboding and angry. Slamming the phone down, Aaron jumped from his chair, grabbing his jacket as he breezed from his office. He knew he was probably blowing things out of proportion, but at the moment, he didn't care.
Aaron craned his neck as he looked around the dingy diner. It wasn't crowded. It was too late for the morning coffee pushers, but too early for the lunch crowd. A few elderly couples cluttered the tables, but aside from that, the place seemed dead. And yet, Donovan was nowhere in site.
Aaron moved toward the counter, resting his arms against it as he peered at the small girl milling about. "Hey," Aaron called, wincing as the girl jumped. "Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."
"Oh, it's you," she said, shaking her head with a smile. "It's ok. I just didn't know anybody was there."
Aaron returned the smile, searching his mind for her name. What was it again? Janice? Janet? Something like that right? All at once, he heard Donovan's voice in his head. Heard the way he accented the end. Saw his smile. Heard his laugh. Aaron shook his head clear, and turned his attention back to the girl. "You're Janette, right?"
Janette smiled shying, nodding her head. "That's right. I'm surprised you remembered."
For some reason, Aaron was taken aback by this statement. There was something about the way the girl responded, the way she seemed so unsure of herself. It crawled under his skin, making him shiver. He'd heard this same tone in Donovan's voice many times. This desolation, and complete void of self-worth. But Donovan hid it better. He made you work to find it, where this tiny girl set it out for the world to see. Aaron began to wonder if this Charlie person was a saint, who took in the shattered, offering them a place to work, or if he was in fact, the one shattering them.
"He's the owner of this diner. He's a wonderful man, really." He remembered Donovan's wistful smile as he had said that, and Aaron found himself wondering. Was he really so wonderful? Or did Donovan just not know any better?
"Sir?" Janette's small voice pulled Aaron from his thoughts, and he offered her an apologetic smile.
"Sorry." She dismissed the apology with a small wave of her hand. "Is Donovan here?"
"No. He was scheduled for this morning, but he called out suddenly."
Aaron's eyes widened, his knuckled turning white as he gripped the counter. "Is everything alright? Did he say what was wrong?" Aaron felt his heart stop, as she turned her head to the side, her eyes reflecting with sad concern. Oh God…
"I don't really know what's going on, but I heard Charlie talking to him."
"Where is he? What happened?" Aaron practically screamed at the girl, his mind racing with horrible scenarios. "Please, tell me." His heart stopped in his chest as she uttered two words that he hoped he'd never have to hear again.
"The hospital."
It was all the same. The burning scent of alcohol, the whitewashed walls that seared his eyes in their impeccable brightness, the panic that ran through every orafice of his body. It was all there, as real as it had been 2 years ago. But he doubted that if anything happened, there would be another chance. There would be no other spunky blond to force their way into his life, breaking down all barriers he had built. There would be no third miracle.
Aaron moved as fast as his legs would take him, slamming his hands against the receptionist desk as he skid to a stop. "I'm looking for somebody," he choked out between long pants. "The last name is Haies. First name, Donovan."
The receptionist regarded Aaron briefly before her eyes widened in realization. "Oh. Yes, Donovan's here."
"Please, where is he? Can I go see him?"
The woman's eyebrows furrowed momentarily in confusion, and Aaron wanted to reach over and shake the information from her. Didn't she know how serious this was to him? "Yeah, he's in the pediatric ward."
"Pediatric?" Aaron blinked. He knew Donovan looked less than his 23 years, but wasn't that pushing it just a bit?
The woman laughed, shaking her head as she turned the other receptionist, whispering something in her ear. The second woman giggled, as the first woman rose to her feet, motioning with her head. "Come on, I'll show you."
Aaron glared at the woman's back as she led him to the elevator. What the fuck was with these people? Did they always make jokes out of these situations? He had a good mind to go complain to somebody. But first, he had to see Donovan. Had to make sure he was alright. And for that reason, he would put up with the impertinence.
"So," the woman turned to him, once they were in the elevator, hiding a smile behind her hand. "You're Donovan's friend, huh?"
Aaron glowered, crossing his arms in front of his chest. "What's it to you?"
The woman shook her head lightly, chuckling as she stepped through the open doors. "Nothing. Nothing at all." After a few moments of walking, the woman stopped Aaron before a large, brightly painted door. "Well, here we are."
Aaron looked from the woman to the door, eyeing both skeptically. "In here?" The woman nodded with a grin that made Aaron feel like an utter fool. He wasn't sure why, but nothing was quite adding up. But that flutter of panic in his stomach was still far too real to ignore, so pushing the woman aside, he made his way through the door.
Aaron looked around the room in utter disbelief. It was as if that one door was the connection between reality and fairytales. There were tipping, plastic looking palm trees lined against a wall painted a vibrant, clear blue with a frothy, yellow sun hanging high in the artificial sky. Along the walls, large eyed, cartoon animals danced around, all playing instruments as their song filled the air with tiny, painted music notes. It was as if he had stepped into a storybook. This was a child's wonderland.
"Aaron?" His eyes shot over to see Donovan rise to his feet from a crayon green carpet, cluttered with half open books and tumbled blocks. Aaron could only watch as Donovan approached him, feeling relief, anger, and embarrassment cloud his mind. "What are you doing here?"
"I…" Aaron shook his head, asking the same question to himself. Sure, he had received a weird phone call, along with the information that the boy was in the hospital, but was he justified in his reaction? Should he have barreled in here, throwing around demands?
Aaron heaved a small sigh of relief as Donovan, obviously picking up on his discomfort, changed his question. "How did you know I was here?"
"I went to the diner after you had called me. I figured something was up, and well, then Janette told me you were in the hospital, so…"
"At," Donovan interrupted with a shake of his head. "At the hospital. Seriously, somebody's got to teach that girl about prepositions."
Aaron slumped against the wall, a hand to his head as he made a small, indescribable noise. Donovan blinked at him in confusion, placing a hand lightly against his arm. "Aaron, are you ok?"
He opened his mouth to respond, but instead, a light chuckle pushed past the lump in his throat, falling from his lips. Within a moment, Aaron was laughing, and hard at that. Laughing like he hadn't done in over 2 years. And it felt amazing.
Donovan looked at him as if he lost his mind, though he couldn't prevent his own smile from spreading across his face, and soon, he found himself laughing along with a joke that was never told.
As the laughter died down, Aaron lifted his head back, drawing in a deep breath. His eyes blinked open as he felt something tug on his sleeve, and he glanced down into the round, pink face of a child. He stared, noticing that something wasn't quite right with this little girl, and his eyes widened as it hit him. The girl had no eyebrows, and there was no hair poking out from under the brightly colored bandana tied around her head.
Aaron's gaze softened as he lowered himself into a crouching position on the floor. "What can I do for you, little miss?"
The girl cocked her head to the side, hugging a teddy bear tighter to her chest. "Are you crazy?"
Aaron blinked, shaking his head as he heard Donovan sputter. "Sometimes, I wonder that myself." The little girl seemed confused by this answer, shrugging her shoulders. "What's your name?" Aaron asked, trying to coax the girl.
"Melanie," she responded, hanging her head shyly.
"And how old are you, Melanie?" The girl extended a hand, stretching her fingers apart, and Aaron found himself shocked again. Five…she's five years old…
"What's your friend's name?" Aaron tried to push aside the wave of nausea that was quickly rising. He had never known you could get ill from pity.
"Templeton."
"Templeton? Isn't that a funny name for a bear?"
"Hey!" Donovan protested from behind.
"Let me guess," Aaron smirked. "You named the bear?"
"Well, I happen to think it's a very good name, right Mel?"
Melanie seemed to consider the question for a bit. "Not really."
Aaron burst out a small laugh as Donovan dropped to the floor beside the girl, pouting. "No? Well then, what would you like his name to be?"
"Roger."
Aaron turned to Donovan, arching an eyebrow. The boy smiled, shrugging his shoulders as he placed a hand above the bear's head. "I dub thee, Roger," Donovan proclaimed, bringing his hand down, grinning widely as Melanie giggled and hugged the bear closer. "Now, why don't you go introduce Roger to the rest of the gang?" The girl nodded, turning quickly as she ran back into the center of the room with the rest of the children.
Aaron watched her for a moment, his heart squeezing in his chest. "Cancer?" he asked finally, turning to Donovan.
Donovan offered him sad, half smile. "Leukemia."
The word froze in Aaron's veins, making his blood run cold. He'd heard about this. About children with life threatening diseases. Children who might never make it to adolescence. Children who might never spend a day of their life outside of hospital walls. The word kept ringing over in his head, making the bile rise in his throat. Children… "How sad," Aaron whispered, and Donovan nodded in agreement.
"It is sad. But don't pity them for it."
Aaron shot a look at Donovan as if he was insane. Don't pity them? He couldn't think of anybody in the world more deserving of pity then these children. "What do you mean?"
"They don't need pity. What they need is love, and to be treated like normal children. To pity them is too look down upon them. They may be young, but they still know the difference. You can pity people from afar, but it takes love to face them. It takes love to understand them." Donovan shot Aaron a sideways glance, before lowering his eyes.
"Donovan…" He wanted to pull the boy into his arms, hold him, and not let him go. He wanted to banish these ideas of pity and sadness from his mind. He wanted to wipe these kids clean for Donovan's sake. He wanted to pull that desolate look from his eyes. Somehow, Aaron wanted to let him know that he wasn't alone. But all he could do was place a hand lightly on his shoulder.
Donovan sighed, picking his head up and flashing Aaron one of his brilliant smiles. "So, you were worried about me, huh?"
Aaron studied Donovan for a minute, not trusting himself to speak. His mind battle between emotion and rationality. On one hand, Aaron wanted to believe that smile was real. But on the other hand, he knew that Donovan was repressing himself, and that he was smiling for Aaron's sake. He may have the rest of the world fooled, but Aaron knew how much Donovan was hurting. It was written clear as day in those traitorous eyes.
"Good afternoon," a voice sang from the doorway. Aaron turned to see a dark-haired man breeze into the room, stopping a few feet from Donovan and himself. He was an older man, though the only indications were the few streaks of gray tangled in his hair, and the slight lines that appeared around his eyes when he flashed them a quick smile. He peered at Aaron for a moment, taking a step back as his eyes give him a once-over, snapping his fingers when his gaze fell across Aaron's left hand. "Ah, you must be Aaron."
Aaron turned inquisitively to Donovan, whose complexion had taken on a light flush. "Ah, Dr. Borelli, this is Aaron. Aaron, Dr. James Borelli."
The doctor chuckled in amusement as he extended a hand to Aaron, who warily accepted. "Well, any friend of Donovan's is a friend of mine. Though, you're probably the first friend I've met."
"And now you understand why that is."
"I guess you got me on that one." Dr. Borelli laughed, scratching his head lightly. "Oh, by the way, I stopped in to drop this off to you." He held out a book he had nestled under his arm, nudging it toward Donovan.
"Oh, thanks! I forgot about this. I'll return it when I'm done."
Dr. Borelli shot Aaron a strange look before shaking his head at Donovan. "Don't worry about it. And I made a little notation in the front for you. Just some of those numbers you had asked for."
Donovan's eyes narrowed in confusion, before they shot open again, looking a bit darker than they had before. "Oh…um…thank you." He looked at the doctor who offered him a thumbs up, and Donovan laughed, smiling more brilliantly than Aaron had ever seen. He didn't know why, but at that moment, Aaron abhorred the man, and he had a good mind to whisk Donovan away from there.
Dr. Borelli smiled at Aaron, in such a fashion that made him wonder if he had spoken his disdain aloud. "Well, I must be off. Please, do me a favor, and take good care of Mr. Haies. He has a tendency to get himself into a bit of trouble every now and then."
Donovan made a small sound of protest to which the doctor laughed, dropping Aaron a quick wink.
Aaron waited from the man to be out of the room, before muttering, "I don't like him."
"What?" Donovan turned to him, his eyes wide. "How can you not? He's funny, brilliant beyond all standards, he's-"
Aaron's eyes narrowed further with each comment, causing Donovan to laugh. "Ok, ok. I see now. Somebody's feeling a bit inferior."
"I am not," Aaron snapped, crossing his arms. He knew he was acting petty and immature, and yet, he couldn't seem to help it.
"Ok. If you say so."
Aaron felt his anger and resentment fade as Donovan turned that smile to him, his eyes sparkling in utter happiness. The doctor was all but forgotten as Donovan reached out, lacing his fingers through Aaron's, and pulled him further into the room. "Come on, I want you to meet some more of my friends."
AN: I know, I know. It's really short. But, I wanted to post this one separate, since I didn't want it to be eclipsed by the next part.
Once again, I have to apologize about reviews. When I deleted the first chapter, I didn't know it would delete all the files that went along with it.
I feel a need to explain the reason for the first part being slightly edited. The first reason was because there were some things I had stated about Aaron I would have had to later expand on. Now, it would have made this story a good two or three parts longer, but it would have been the two of them fighting, and I didn't want to write that, and I don't think you all wanted to read that. The second reason is that in one of reviews that was posted to me, I was told I was using too much description (If I hadn't erased all my reviews, I'd be able to tell you who that was). I'll be damned if when I went back and re-read it, I was thoroughly embarrassed, cause she was dead on. I was using all those bad fanfiction clichés. So, please, if any of you have constructive criticism, I implore you to give it (but can we try and avoid the whole "you have a typo over here" thing?). And I'd like to shout a thanks to the reviewer, who helped me become just a little better as a writer.