Lie

I really hate you.
Honestly, I do.
I was just lying when I said I loved you.
I was lying to you
and myself.
I hate myself for it, too.
I have a reputation,
and you know it.
I hate all men,
or don't you remember?
Maybe I should hook up
with a misogynist.
We could be angry together.
Heh. The fateful 'T'-word.
Who needs it?
I flip it off as I run away.
But that's all I'm doing.
Running away.
Being afraid.
Hiding from things
that I want to embrace.
Putting up a brave face
and a weak facade.
Have I mentioned
that I hate myself?
So, so stupid.
So, so weak.
I've seen what happens.
The pain, the heartache.
Wouldn't it just be easier
to circumvent all this
stupidity and laugh in the face
of everything and everyone?
It should be.
But it isn't.
I may snarl, glare, and grumble,
but, in truth, I kinda' like it.
Love, that is.

~

I sometimes wonder why I post these things. X_X Gah.
And yes, the broken, nasty pattern is quite intentional. ¬.¬
Someone save me from my own madness...