72AN: I'm so glad you guys liked this story… You know when I started chapter one I wasn't meaning to take it seriously, but I decided to post it anyway. It was just some sort of outlet after writing one dark grueling chapter of my other story (that one I am taking very seriously). Thanks for the support everyone! Don't forget to review! Also, if you want to suggest an idea for the next chapters, feel free to do so.
War Freaks and Greeks
By Fox Dance
Chapter Two: Eros Saves the World
Rrrrrrrrrrriiiiiip!
Gulp! Gasp! No! Gyaaaaaaahhh!
Okay, so maybe I'm a bit over-acting, but hey, what's a girl to do when she is currently undergoing what promises to be the most embarrassing day of her life?
While my face busily switches from one shade of red to another, I tear away my eyes away from a really good-looking face to glance down at my bent legs, then lower, wishing fervently that the distinct, nightmarish ripping sound was not from THERE.
Oh gods, please no, please no, anything but there, I'll give anything, even my beloved cousin Eros, just not my—
But there it was! That evil, evil little rip just at the seams just beneath the zipper of my jeans.
Noooooooooooh!
And with that, I hear the deathly rumbles of a super-typhoon hell-bent on submerging the entire state of California underneath several feet of sludge water…
Okay, wait, damage control! Breath once, twice, yeah, that's it. Maybe, HOPEFULLY, I just imagined everything up. I am, after all, having a bad day. Yes, perhaps hallucination from too much caffeine intake. It's okay, Sarah, you can open your eyes now…
Good lord, California is doomed.
Shit! It's pink!
Correction: neon pink.
My panties are choke NEON pink.
Ohmygosh ohmygosh ohmygosh this isn't happening! Of all the days that I could choose to wear the only embarrassing piece of underwear I have (okay, well, I've got one with holes, but hey) I chose THIS particular day to wear THIS particular underwear. With that bright a color peeking through dark denims like mine, it positively screams 'hey, look at me, look at meeee!'
"Uh… Miss? Are you okay? Are you hurt?"
Oh gods, he has such a sexy voice…
I gather enough sanity to tilt my head back to the unknown guy's face, the one who I bumped into, and somberly shake my head.
Oh wait, I take it back. I do hurt. Me EGO smarts pretty bad, see…
He crouches before me for a closer look. CLOSER LOOK?! Shit, gotta close my legs. Close, legs, close! Come on, dammit, just close! Of all the friggin' times to be paralyzed…
His face so near, I get a better look at what had earlier taken my breath away. He wasn't as pretty as my effeminate-looking but nerdy cousin Eros, and not really what most girls would consider conventionally handsome, but he had this earthy, rugged look to him that really appealed to me. His face was all smooth angles, but kind-looking. I don't know, maybe for all my evil ways I'm attracted to people nicer than me? Yeah right. Anyway, he had dark brown hair, the most adorable brown eyes with little gold flecks in them, which would have melted my cold, cold heart if only they weren't squinting back at me really weird …
"Miss? I'm really sorry, I didn't see you, it's just that one of my contact lenses popped out and…" He pauses, squints his right eye closed, probably the one with the remaining lens. "Um, I think your left eye is twitching."
Indeed it was, my friends. Twitching like one of the many victims of my thunderbolts outside right now as they await their descent unto the underworld, suffering from the pandemonium my distress has unleashed.
He stumbles back, going a little pale at my strange eye movement.
Yeah, notice how my eye twitches every time I'm trying to suppress my frustration? Cute, eh? Wanna see more? If stick my finger into my eye like this and prod the eyeball like this, you can see, my good-looking boytoy, that it seems like it's gonna pop right out and head straight for your really large gaping mouth… Yeah, just continue looking at me like I'm a goddamn freak and you'll know soon how a demi-god's cornea tastes like…
Gods, I am so mean.
And just like that, everything falls back in place, and the evil daughter of Ares regains her sadistic self back. Nothing like an annoying teenager to stir the old blood, eh?
I clamp my legs shut, catching his chin between the knees, and I peer at him maliciously.
"You, my good friend, just knocked me down. You know what happens to people who knock me down? I bestow upon them everlasting paiiiiin!"
"I said I was sorry, Miss, really I am…"
"Have you no idea who I am?" I say again in a voice dripping with acid.
"Sorry, today's my first day you see, and I'm a little lost."
"What did you see?" I say, starting to shake his head. "WHAT DID YOU SEE YOU STUPID SON OF A—!"
"NOTHING!" he screams, flinging his arms wildly. "I can't see without my contact lenses! Let me go! Let me go! FREAK!"
Freak? Did he just call me a… freak?
The sky rumble once more with renewed fury. I smile sadistically as I hear the sounds of screaming teenagers evacuating the school premises, sensing that this decrepit old building wasn't gonna hold from a tornado.
Cool, a tornado from Kansas is gonna blow the school away to the Land of Oz…
"Say your prayers, little boy, 'coz you're about to meet my Uncle Hades and his big hungry three-headed dog of DOOM! You're dog meat, punk!"
I feel the tension escalating, the blood pressures rising, and the atmospheric disturbance that will probably wipe every Californian from the face of the planet.
Hark! The end is near!
Like I care? snort I can always move in to Olympus if I do manage to annihilate the entire state. Heck, maybe I'll do just that, right after I manage to wrench off Contact Lens Boy's head from his neck… Oh yeah, that's it, I can feel it coming along, twisting really slowly now… Just one more big tug…
"SARAH! NOOOOOOHHH!"
That, my friends, was the voice of a hero, the voice of one who dared run to stop me from unleashing my fury upon this unfortunate boy and ultimately bringing total ruin to the fair institution called Willard High.
It was Eros.
Damn.
I see him coming towards me, and like an insane movie gone terribly wrong everything happens in slow motion. He appears from around the corner of the corridor, school uniform flapping in the stormy winds, leaping towards me, dramatically reaching out…
Splat!
Trust my cousin to ruin a good moment.
"Oww… Stupid shoelaces…"
Gasp Mr. I-Love-The-World swore! I could hear the heavens open up, the angels singing halleluia…
Wait. I am in the process of bringing hell upon an unfortunate soul, aren't I?
I turn to whirl back to face him, this unnamed guy who is currently trying to squirm away from my grasp, to shake him senseless by the neck when a quick, sharp pain punches me from behind.
"Have to…save mankind!" Eros grunts behind me, and immediately I know I have been ANNIHALATED!
It wasn't the knife-stabbing kinda pain. It was worse. The pain of it, the agony of it spread through my entire body, shaking me to the bones, wringing what sanity I have left as the sensation drowned me…
The endless, powerful waves of the vilest things known to human kind, rippling agonizingly through me from that one strike…
TRUE LOVE.
In shaky stupor, I turn my head to find a suspicious-looking pink arrow sticking out of my left shoulder.
Cupid's arrow.
This is it. Defeated, by a nerdy, fumbling god of love!
You guys all see those freaky little images of Eros as a cherub on diapers shooting heart-tipped arrows? You know what happens when you get hit by an arrow right? Yeah. That's it, you're getting it…
Fall in love with the first person you see, why don't you?
Since my dear accident-prone cousin is still lying smack down on the floor, the only other guy within my field of vision was HIM, that annoying man who called me a freak…
Don't look, Sarah, don't look!
But my neck's starting to hurt!
Listen to me, dammit, this is your sanity screaming here!
I… can't…
Despite the rowdy screams of my incredibly noisy unconscious, my head rotates on its own volition, turning, until my eyes fall upon the shocked face of the man with the missing contact lenses.
Damn that god of love…
It was, fellow psychopaths, what normal people call 'love at first sight'. At least my first sight with an arrow sticking out of my body anyway.
And just like that, the storm clouds dissipated, and California was once again sunny and clear and a safer place for all surfers and the rest of humankind. Thanks to Eros, who saved the day!
He is soooo dead.
"EROS!"
"Yikes!" The little squirt scrams away for fear of a wedgie, but I catch him just as he jumps off the window with an almighty dose of pure, livid THUNDER!
I jump off the guy I had just previously attempted to massacre to fetch the impish blonde nerd from the charred remains of the hall windows. I grab him by the collar and proceed to drag his charcoaled body down the hall. He's still breathing of course. Lucky imp's immortal, what a drag…
I halt before Mr. Missing Contact Lenses to give him a measuring look, noting with satisfaction the trepidation in his pretty gold-speckled eyes, and grab him on the collar to raise him eye-level to mine.
They say there's a thin line between love and hate, but I think I've just erased the line…
"I love you," I say simply.
Then I gave him a kiss that literally rocked the world.
That's all I remember, really. The next thing I knew, I was already outside, dragging Eros' charred remains by the collar four blocks down the street to my humble abode.
But one thing, though; after the earthquake, I could have sworn he was kissing me back.