8Life never happens the way you want it to. It never listens to what your saying. It dances around and messes it self up, always knowing your going to be there to clean it up. Its like your next-door neighbors child learning how to ride a bike, the only problem is, you're the only one learning anything. You're the only one getting scratched up, bruised and battered. But then some times, Life gives you a time of peace. It rarely lasts. In reality, the only lesson that a person needs to know is that they NEVER, no matter what they think or how respected they are, have control of their lives. I learned this from Lyn. He taught me so much in such a short amount of time. Then he was gone. Torn from my grasp. I've been cold and dead inside ever since.
Everyone knows that some thing happened, that for a while, I had my time in the eye of the storm. They also know that my time there was short and whatever happened to end it was a very touchy subject. I tended to get extremely disagreeable and pissy. Sad thing is, Lyn was taken for me 3 years ago. Im only 21. You do the math. I know what your think. 'Such a young age to be so bitter.' Or some such shit like that. Well, you go through the shit I have and see if you're not bitter. See, then only reason Im still alive right now is because I write poetry. If you tell anyone I'll break your face in.
My brother, Tiel, walk in on my trying to kill my self with a razor blade 6 months after Lyn . . .after Lyn died. They took my to the hospital, considering I already had a really deep cut in my left wrist. I still have to scare. See the white line. Some people despise what they think this line signifies. They just assume things. This white line is my declaration of love for Lyn Hawkins. No one knows that either. Just like they don't know I write.
Lyn? Gods, he was . . . everything to me. He was my light. He was so beautiful. He was the one there to keep me tethered here. He was so carefree. So lighthearted. Nothing could put him down. Then they had to take him away from me. I shouldn't have let him drive. I should have made him stay the night. He was mine . . . all mine. Then they took him. They ripped him out of my arms. He died in my arms. He told me he loved me, and that if he made it I was going to be his first. AND THEN HE DIED! His beautiful green eyes slid shut and he stopped breathing. His lung . . . it had a whole in it, cause his rib had broken from the collision. It had made a whole. The doctor didn't know until it was to late. God it hurt. The doctor that told us either didn't care or just had no emotion cause the whole time he was telling us I was sobbing into Tiels stomach and the basterd didn't even bat an eyelash.
The guy that hit him? He's in jail for life. I think he should be put to death. Its sickening.
Is this all? Thank you. Yes I'll Be here next week, Doc.