A/N: Hey... er... there's not that many people that read this, and one of the two has has 56k but I'll tell u anyway. If you can, download Sarah Mclachlan - Adia and listen to it after Mary drops the coins at Rune's door (sorry.. I know spoiler). Okay I'm done.
Do not set foot on the path of the wicked or walk in the way of evil men. Avoid it, do not travel on it; turn from it and go on your way.
For they cannot sleep till they do evil; they are robbed of slumber till they make someone fall.
They eat the bread of wickedness, and drink the wine of violence.
Proverbs 4:14-17
All of us Within - Adia
The door crept open as the light quietly seeped into the room. For several minutes, Mary stood at the open door, unable to decide whether to enter or not. Grasped tightly in her palm was the bag of coins. A gentle wind blew from behind her, blowing her hair forward into the silence of the empty room.
It was morning once again; all was over. A night of killing, death, and betrayal was over. The morning came once again, sweeping the sin away from the earth with the deceiving smile of dawn.
One by one, Mary stepped into the room lifting one foot after another. She could feel the wood vibrate as her heel struck against the floor. As she closed the door behind her, she dropped the bag of coins on the floor. They tumbled out of the bag like fruit, spinning on the wood. She could hear the irritating noise of metal, spinning playfully against the floor. Oh how deceiving the sound was to her, seeming jaunty after it had been washed in the blood of a friend.
Mary dropped to the floor, bending down on her hands and knees. She cried as tears fell from her eyes like rain. Pulling her hands into fists, she cried out in pain; she cried out in agony and remorse.
No words were said.
Why? The sound played over and over again in her head. The sound of blaming another though the blood was on her hands. Why did Rune make her betray her closest friend? Without her, he could still have been alive. If only her mother hadn't died, she wouldn't have to be so desperate for money. Everything was all Rune's fault, she had nothing to do with it. Nothing was her fault. She didn't kill Adrian. She was just doing something in an effort to live. It wasn't her fault. If she hadn't followed Rune, she would have died...it wasn't her fault.
But it was all too late. Every shitty excuse she made, it was always just going to be too damn late. For her own survival, her own life, she had taken the price of sacrificing someone so close to her as Adrian. The only price for life was death.
In that same morning, Rune gravitated towards the old church, glistening in the newborn sunrise. Standing in front of the two glass doors of the house of God, he quietly awaited the presence of Satan. His face showed now emotion. His face was the face of a killer.
"I didn't expect you to come early," Than's mysterious voice crept into Rune's ears. Rune hadn't even noticed when he came out of the church.
Rune threw the bottle of blood on the dirt in front of him. The crimson liquid splashed around in the bottle, smearing against the glass.
"Come and take it from me. It's yours now."
Than bent down and grasped the bottle into his bloodthirsty hands, "You did well Rune. You did well."
Than reached into his pocket and pulled out a bag of coins. His cynical smile widened, and the menacing look in his eyes squeezed in, "I'm finally able to give this to you."
Rune grabbed the bag from Than's hands and turned away. He didn't look back once at him; he just walked away from the church with the bag of money in his hands. He no longer valued, or treasured small coins. The more he received, the bigger he wanted. It just hadn't satisfied him, as it would have before.
All alone Mary sat on her bed, holding her knees against her chest. Her eyes, blurred from her tears, stared out into the emptiness of the room. The emptiness. The loneliness. The void. And always... the silence.
Softly, the abyss took Mary's hand as she held it out beside her white dress. The rag doll she adored was now gone, lost in a place she could never reach. The only thing that she ever held close to her was nonexistent. That was the beauty of it. She never opened up her secret treasure chest to anyone, not even Adrian. No matter how much anyone ever wanted her to open up, she only whispered secrets into the ears of her doll. The doll that never talked. The doll that always listened. The doll that never cared for itself, but only for Mary. The doll whose purpose in life was to satisfy her master. All that surrounded her was Mary's selfish love.
Cuddling with her rag doll every night, the girl was still just a small child, a small child in a big world of hatred. The only thing a flower can do in a dumpster is wither, die, and reek of death. When left all alone, a child will only do what surrounds them, copying the actions of what they believe is right. Though even a small child, even the most innocent of hearts can be contaminated.
As Rune opened the door to his house, he took off his coat and hung it on the hat rack.
"Rune." His father shouted. He only said one word. One word was all that he needed to say.
Rune looked up at his father, "Aren't you glad that your only son has returned home?"
"Why aren't you at school?"
"Don't you know, the school closed down today. You should really pay attention to your surroundings. Don't you visit the orphanage a lot? Don't you have to make the town like and trust you?"
"That's none of your business."
"I'm not trying to bud in. It's always the same, you assume things too quickly. Assumption is the downfall of humanity."
"Don't you dare try to play smart with me. This damn humanity has already fallen, what's the difference. I don't have time to deal with you right now. Hurry and go to your room."
Rune shot a glare into his father's eyes; it made his eyes sting. After a few seconds, he walked back up towards his room.
"Everything's still the same..." Rune spoke quietly. As he lifted his feet, one after another, he contemplated. Did he really think that anything would change? Would he actually get courage to stand up to his father? Nothing changed; it was all the same. Rune felt that after he murdered Adrian, things would get better, but how could that possibly change anything. His life was exactly the same. In reality, nothing ever gets better; reality never changes.
Suddenly, as Mary's shrilling voice forced itself out of her mouth, she threw the bag of coins against the wall.
"I hate you! I hate you so much! Why did you do this to me?!"
Standing at the center of the room, with her white dress floating in the wind that blew in from the window, she yelled. Words of hate, words of anguish, words of revenge.
"I hate you mother! I hate you for leaving me all alone! I hate you for forcing me to do this! I hate you Rune! I hate you for making me kill Adrian! I hate you for tempting me!"
Her body snapped like a twig and fell to the floor. Tears were flowing out, tears that she had kept in for too long.
"Being alone is so horrible..." Mary sobbed as tears streaked down her face, "Humans weren't born to be alone, but they're still born alone. Humans were put on this earth to help others, yet people only want to satisfy themselves. The sole reason why people help others is because they get compensation in return. Why? Why is it that if I was born to be with other people that I'm alone right now?! Being alone is so horrible... I'm all alone now... Adrian... you left me... I made you leave... I forced you to leave... I couldn't let you stay any longer... I hate you Mary..."
Her auburn hair lifted from the ground as Mary stood up. She picked up the coins and neatly sorted them in the red bag of blood. She left the door open after she left, only caring about the bag in her hand.
She walked down the path she took to school, and passed the ruins of the old office building with the overturned vending machine. The dust lifted into the air as she passed the closed down classroom and passed the clearing where she saw Cedric's dead, headless body. She passed the snack store, the old church, and the empty house that a boy named Adrian used to live in. As she reached the doctor's house at the end of the road, she dropped the bag of coins at the foot of his door, and left. There was only one place left to go to.
She lifted her dress as she dragged herself up the hill. Ahead of her, the withered garden loomed into sight, almost as if untouched. The wind was still and resilient, and the splatters of blood were still stained in the dirt. She looked to the side of the garden where Adrian yelled his last word. Her flower was still there, hanging limply in the daylight, but Adrian's body had disappeared.
Mary's eyes widened as she stared at the empty spot in the dirt. The blood was still there, but the body was gone.
She clasped her hand over her mouth, "Where could they have taken him..."
She fled and searched all over town, looking for the person who had took his body but she couldn't find anyone. She desperately asked the clerks at the stores, the teacher at the orphanage, and the interns at the church but no one could tell her where he had gone to.
She looked inside his house, but she only found the corpse of his dead mother lying on the bed. Hurried and panicked, she ran back to her house to see if anyone came to tell her, but she found a boy with brown, messy hair with innocent, frightened eyes.
"A-adia..." Mary could barely speak, "What are you... what are you d-doing here?"
The frightened boy staggered towards Mary. His eyes were terrified, "What h-happened here?"
Mary was silent.
"I had a horrible dream last night... I was with you after Cedric had died, and we talked a lot. You kissed me on the cheek, but you ran away after that. I tried to go after you, but then someone took me and tried to kill me. I could feel it every time that person pierced the dagger through me. It hurt so much, and it wouldn't stop. I never felt something that hurt so much before. Mary, tell me what happened last night!"
They both looked at each other. Adrian could see that Mary's eyes had been crying. Both of them, terrified and confused, they stood there as silence surrounded them.
"Adrian..." Mary whimpered, "You told me before... I asked you which was better, a lie that draws a smile, or a truth that draws a tear. You told me that the truth was always better, so now I'm going to tell you the truth."
Adrian looked into Mary's eyes, afraid of what she would so soon tell him. His eyes that would in a few seconds lose its innocence forever.
"Rune... He had been using you ever since the beginning. Everyone was using you. He had a deal with the pastor's son to give him the potion. He stole it from his father and tried to give it to you so that if you got caught, you would be the one that was killed, but then you drank the potion... The only way that Rune could get the potion back from you was if he could take your blood. That day when you tried to save Marcus, you became Cedric and Dennis' enemy. Rune magnified their hatred for you so far that they would go so far as to kill you. And when Cedric was killed, he had made Dennis kill his only friend and frame you for murdering him."
"..This can't be true... Stop it Mary. Stop telling me this!"
"That day when I lied to you and left from school," Mary continued, ignoring Adrian's voice, "I made a deal with Rune. I made a deal that if he gave me a certain amount of money, that I would agree to kill you. He knew that I was the one that you trusted with all your heart, and I could be the only one that would betray you."
"This isn't true! You're lying to me!"
"Last night, I led you into that garden where no one would see and I kissed you, signaling Rune to kill you. He was hiding behind you, and he murdered you with a bag put around your head. I'm so sorry Adrian. I treated you like dirt. I don't know why you care for me so much. I betrayed-"
"STOP IT!" Adrian screamed at the top of his lungs. He covered his ears and ran passed Mary as fast as he could.
It didn't matter where his feet took him, he just ran to whatever place he could. To him, it wasn't possible. Rune and Mary were his two best friends; they couldn't have possibly tried to kill him. Rune wasn't like that. He was generous and nice, always smiling at him making him feel better. Mary was going crazy. She was making up weird stories so she could get attention. Maybe what she had told him was just some dream she had dreamt up after her mother had died.
Suddenly, he bumped into Rune. Just as he had expected, Rune gave him the same look he saw upon Mary's face, "Adrian?! Why are you-"
"You don't have to look at me like that!" Adrian yelled, "I see you every day! You don't have to look at me so surprised."
"Oh I'm sorry. I just... didn't know-I wasn't... expecting to see you here."
"Rune... look at me in the eye. Tell me the truth."
"What's wrong...?" Rune's eyes were wandering.
"Look at me in the eye and tell me the truth!" Adrian clung onto Rune's collar, forcing him to look himself in the eye, "Mary told me that you tried to kill me last night... She told me that you made a deal with someone and you agreed to kill me... Tell me the truth Rune. After all of that you've done to me, just tell me the truth now. Is it true?"
"Adrian... I-"
"Tell it to me!"
"...it's... "
Adrian could feel his heart pounding. They drummed against his chest, shaking his body like a seizure. He couldn't contain the exploding feeling inside of him.
"It's true Adrian... I killed you last night."
Mary, sitting on the floor of her bedroom, held a letter inside her hand. Adrian had come back, she had a second chance. She didn't deserve a second chance. When she was alone, she realized how horrible living a life alone was and how she couldn't live without Adrian. Though she may never forgive herself, Adrian would forgive her. That was how much they loved each other. He was always with her for as long as he could remember. She was born to be with him. The only reason why she had appeared in her mother's womb was to take care of Adrian. They were meant for each other.
Just then, she heard someone walking towards the house. She rushed to greet Adrian, letting out her heart to him.
"Adia! I have to tell you something." She announced, holding the white envelope in her hand, "I lo-"
Suddenly, Adrian slapped her. As Mary's face turned away, she could hear the sound of Adrian's hand hitting against the skin of her cheek echoing in her mind. She didn't blink an eye.
"You don't deserve to call me Adia. How can you call me that if you don't even know me. I hate you."
Mary still hadn't turned her head to face Adrian. She didn't want to see the painful expression that was on his face.
Adrian held out his hand and threw the rag doll in the floor. It tumbled in the dirt, covering his bloodstain with the dust in the air, "The only reason why I came back to you was to give that to you. I'm giving you your rag doll because I know that I'm never going to see you again. I don't want to see your face again. I was happy before you told me the truth. Now, I can never be the same again. I can never live the way that I had lived before. I can never be happy again, knowing the truth now. And for that, I hate you with all my heart."
Adrian turned away from her, facing the road that led out of the town, "I'll continue to live forever, and I'll wander forever. I'm going to leave this town, the town that gave me so much pain. I'll never come back to this town, and I'll never see you again."
With her head still turned to the side, she could hear Adrian's shoes pick up from the sand on the road. As the sound faded away, she knew that Adrian would leave forever. Slowly, the sound softened. That would be the last sound she would ever hear from him. Then, the sound faded away into a silence.
She fell to her knees and dropped the letter she would have given him. Once more, lying on her hands and knees, she recited the words that were written inside the envelope, "I'm sorry Adrian. When you were gone, I realized how useless I was without you. I realized that my purpose in life was to take care of you. I'm going to throw everything away and make sure that you're okay for the rest of your life. You'll never be alone again. You'll never have to be afraid again. Because Adia... I love you..."
As the dirt kicked up from his feet, he left the town without one look back. He stared out at the emptiness in the plains ahead of him, but he didn't hesitate. Walking alone by himself, he thought about many things, things about the town.
"That dream I had last night. When I woke up from the dream, I sat there thinking of how horrible it was. No one was living the way they were supposed to. Everyone was filled with hatred, only wanting to please themselves at others' expense. The world is quickly tumbling into the fire yet the world does nothing to save itself. It made me feel sad.
They often say that the Devil doesn't appear with red horns, sneaking through the back door, but with a suit on through the front door. It's true that Satan doesn't appear in places where you think it would, but in the places that is least expected. I used to think that in the house of God, Satan couldn't enter, but he can be brought in from the hearts of people. We feel safe in church, but it doesn't mean that we're immune to temptation. His sweet voice is the voice that we like to hear. It's the voice we follow. All of us have fear and insecurities that we try to hide, but the Devil can see those things. He tries to enlarge those fears and insecurities, trying to make us do evil and often times it's successful. Though our hearts are quickly judged innocent, they can be easily corrupted just as quickly. It makes me very sad.
The world today isn't any better than it had been before. People continue trying to make them happy without realizing that it does the exact opposite. We feel that if we can get rid of our fear, we can live happily. When a human hits another human being, that human being feels superior. We're all afraid of being inferior because we don't want to die. We want to seem strong and independent so we can defend ourselves. No one likes to say, "You're stronger than me", but rather the other way around.
Others fear unhappiness, so they do things to acquire supplement to satisfy their unhappiness. It's weird how people do funny things when they're afraid. People would do anything to put a few coins in their pockets. They smile on the outside, wanting everyone to trust them just so they can get away with murder. Without fear, people feel strong and courageous, just like they have no weaknesses. They think that doing evil can get rid of their fears to make them look stronger. But many people fail to realize, that courage is not the absence of fear, but it's doing what's right.
All of these people are vulnerable to Satan. Because Satan can satisfy their fears through the easy way out, people reject God because they know that God will make them realize their sins. It isn't that they don't know that he's there for them, they know he's there. They know that God is always there to help them, and to help us with our fears. He promised Joshua, and the rest of humanity that he will be with us so that we will have nothing to be afraid of. Yet, we ignore God's voice because Satan's voice is easier. It's very sad.
However, Satan knows that we know he's evil, yet he still manages to get us to follow him. He uses those who are trusted and adored by everyone to be his messengers. He takes their fear and manipulates it to make the person do evil. And as that trusted and adored person does evil, others follow and do the same. If he tells someone, "Let's steal and lie and cheat", people will follow. As absurd as it sounds, it happens every day. As the virus spreads, innocence is conquered and God is further pushed out of our lives. Just like a body with a fatal disease, it will spread to everything and when it gets to the last ounce of life left in the body, it shows no mercy. In this world, innocence is trampled over like the insects of the dirt.
If someone asked us, "Do you believe in God?" we would without a doubt tell that person we do, but if someone asked us "Do you follow God?", we would think twice about what comes out of our mouths. We're constantly surrounded by people, including ourselves, that are known as lukewarm believers. People think that through God we can just get salvation, and after that we continue to follow the Devil. People lie, deceive, cheat, and kill. They thirst for blood, not stopping until they can smell the stench of death."
Adrian turned behind him and looked at the town that looked so small to him, "I woke up from that dream, thinking how awful it was. I told myself that what I saw in the dream couldn't have possibly taken place in the town I live in. I told myself that I wasn't at all like them... But in reality, I realized that it's All of us Within."
A/N: Wow... lol, when I was revising, I was looking at the essay at the end thinking "Did I write that?". Well, I know that this is probably the most unpopular story I've written so far, but I hope that the few people that read it actually got something out of it. Well, before I end the story, I wanna put special thanks to those people who have been encouraging me with the story.
Cindy Moon – You've always been an encouragement, with my writing and basically everything else. Hahah, if only Kelly and Kristen would read this... well thanks for keeping up with my stories, even though you nearly killed yourself to read them. And oh yeah... Mary is actually based on... someone who I thought was my best friend... but in the end not really... Actually, I think Mary is a better person than the actual person she was based on. Hahah, I sound so bitter, but believe me I've gotten over it by now... I think...
Idesel – Wow... you've been a great encouragement to me as well. Reviewing every chapter *sniff sniff* makes me cry lol. Everytime when I felt like there was no one reading... thinking I was wasting my time writing it, your reviews popped up and it always made me feel better lol. Thanks a lot for that.
A/N: Well, thank you everyone else who read *cough*aznistic*cough*. Hahah, well thank you everyone who wanted to read it but was in some random place, *cough*example hong kong*cough* at the time. Well I hope to see you guys reading my other fics as well (...sounds so greedy). Okay now review.