Why continue on

Some times I wonder if its better to live crying
Or allow my brain to keep frying
Should I give up or die trying
to find my place
From a life I had so full of disgrace
Hate, and sad times
So much shit has happened to me
I wanna wash it all way
Be blind in the mind so I can't see

All I hear at night is the echoes of fighting
Brought up from the so called better past
At least when my dad was more fucked up
We got along

When my two of my friends died it felt so wrong
I popped some pills and went back to my bong
And its this kind of shit that makes living hard
Makes you look in the mirror watch time pass
And wonder where the fuck did I go wrong

Its this shit that leads mt down the so called "wrong" path
But do the math
At least I can finally fell good

My life so fucked up
I think at least I should be to

But I don't give a shit
It doesn't matter when
Or how
Or Why

I know I will just keep getting high
To leave this place behind

But why take the trouble
Maybe I should just get over with
It just keeps getting worse

So why give myself stress
Why just keep getting and dealing with trouble

I don't know why
Im gonna try and keep on living
To see a better time and a better day
and maybe then I will be a pawn of different ways