Chapter One

I sat up on the dewy grass of the hill, a heavy feeling weighing down my heart like a bag of bricks and cement. I took a long drag of my cigarette, exhaling the smoke into the sky, watching it float off into the multi- coloured hue forming strange and often alien hazy forms.

I frowned, a tear crawling like a mouse from under a stone, rolling down my cheek. My black eyeliner ran down my face, but I had given up caring. So much had happened over the last two years that I dared not even think about anything.

But no matter what I tried to suppress, I couldn't stop thinking about everything, and it got too much. Okay, I hadn't been ready but he had forced me to go and sort it out, shouting, screaming and yelling at me as if I'd let it happen.

I pulled my knees closer to my chest as the familiar sound of a diesel car pulled up behind me. I stood up, arms folded, flicking my cig stump over the hilltop, watching it fall and twist through the air.

"C'mon," he said firmly, as if trying to order me around, just like he always did. I stood there, my back to him. I heard his footsteps come up behind me, feeling his rough grasp on my shoulder. He crushed my arm and it hurt. "Come on!" he continued, and I turned around, an iron expression hardening my jaw line and hollowing out my shoulders. It was cold up there as late afternoon gripped the earlier heat and squeezed it dry, but I refused to shiver in case I looked frightened of him.

"No!" I screamed at him, and his hand instinctively raised to my face, giving me a stinging slap across my cheek.

"Get in the car," he said, his eyes a steely grey, laced with malice and anger. I raised my face, levelling my eyes with his. "Oh, I get is about the abortion isn't it?"

"Fuck you." I growled between my teeth, my brow furrowed in a set frown.

"You already did." he said spitefully, the laugh that followed screaming into my heart, tearing it apart with its teeth. How could he be so cold?

I coiled back, trying to compress all my anger for just a few seconds. That would be enough just to give me enough power and strength.

I delivered a swift boot into his groin area, and his face changed from one of disrespect to one of extreme pain.

"Next time," I said, "be careful what you do with your dick. You know, you lousy fucker, that it was as much your fault as it was mine. And you gave me no choice about the fucking abortion, you self-centred asshole. Get over yourself, and go and find yourself some other idiot to push around. We're over. Hear me? OVER!"