So much time passes and I hate you so much I could cry.
I love you. I hate you. I love you.
I never sent you any of the letters I wrote.
I told you time and time again that I loved you in my little ways through our emails. I have poured my heart out to you, but you are a special case.
I have tried to explain to Joe why I can't tell you anymore.
He doesn't understand because he doesn't know you.
He doesn't understand because he wasn't there when I fell in love with you.
He doesn't understand because he's never seen me about to give up and then you turn around and reel me back in as if you know when I'm about to leave you forever.
I don't understand because I'm better than that.
I'm so angry because I don't think you care at all.
I'm so upset because I deserve better than to pine over someone who can't keep in touch with me.
I'm so angry because I can't get over you and it's stupid because you only ever hinted at a relationship with me.
I hate this. I love this. I hate this.
So much time has passed and I hate this so much I could cry.
August 19, 2003