The Amazing Adventure of Scrub Girl

When someone says 'superhero' what do you think? You think Batman, Superman, Spiderman, Wonder Woman, Aqua Man, X-Men, Captain Planet, and Queen of the Flutter Ponies, but you would be wrong. Oh, yes. You would be wrong. For I, Scrub Girl, protector of Mazama, am the real hero! Me with my sidekick, Bummy, (the blue rabbit used to hit people) save the world…or at least Mazama…with our mighty powers! Wahaha! We fight against villains such as Captain Blowtorch, Sally Sue, and the worst…Goggle Man.

Me and Goggle Man go way back, you see. He's been my neighbor ever since I could remember. We've been through many battles, Goggle Man and me. And all six years of my life, he's never conquered our small town, despite his best efforts. But our greatest battle ever was: The Battle of the Pizza Man…

It was a night. A night like any other night. But this night was different. Oh, yes. A different night. For tonight, was special. More special than last night. Or even the night before. Very special. But it was still a night. A very special night. It was Tuesday. Tuesday night. And we all know what happens on Tuesday. Pizza night!

The yummy food that those wonderful little Italian guys came up with. Yum! Pizza. There was only one problem. We didn't get pizza on Tuesday nights. Our neighbors did. Yes. Goggle Man's house. I have long suspected that Goggle Man pays off Pizza Guy, in order to get him to help infiltrate our small town of Mazama. I have watched, Tuesday after Tuesday of Pizza Guy going to my neighbor's door and handing him a box. Suspicious, I know. It was high time I did something about it! But Pizza Guy often came after my bedtime. Daddy wants me in bed by seven. And the clock was clicking!…ticking. Whatever.

I wasn't sure what time it was, but I knew it was nearing seven. I knew because Daddy was doing what he did every night around bedtime. Sitting back in his big chair and reading a book in front of our fireplace. Sometimes Daddy just likes to relax, because he works real hard all day. He's a great daddy! Bestest daddy in the world! But this isn't about my daddy. This is about Goggle Man and Pizza Guy!

I watched as my daddy grabbed his book from the mantle and sat down. I sure did hope that Pizza Guy came soon! But until then I'll just have to sit and wait. I fed most of my dinner to our dog, Trooper, because I didn't want it.

But, hark, what's that? Is it…a car? A pizza car? I dashed to the window…boy, am I ever sneaky! And what was it I saw? Was it…was it…it was! It was Pizza Guy! He was driving down Goggle Man's driveway. I looked over at our sliding glass door. How to sneak out without Daddy noticing?

He would hear if I got the door open. Only because I would have dragged the chair over to reach the handle. How to…I have it! The window! The window in Daddy's room is always part open. Maybe it would be open enough for me to squeeze through? It was my only chance!

With sneakiness that amazed even myself I ran to my daddy's room. There it was. The window. With Bummy in hand, I crawled over to it. Bummy would have to go first. I tossed the small stuffed rabbit out the window, and waited to hear if he plunged to his death…there was no screaming. It was safe.

I crawled up onto Daddy's bed, then stepped up onto the window sill. Before I knew it, I was out! Free! Wahaha! But that's not the point. I picked up my sidekick and dropped to the ground, army crawling across our yard. I don't really know the point of this, but the guys on TV always do it…so I guess I will, too.

Pizza Guy parked his car just as I reached Goggle Man's house. Now what was my next move…I had to know what Goggle Man was hiding in that pizza. I had to. I licked my lips nervously as I neared his house. The doorbell rang. I could hear it from my hiding spot.

"Hey," Goggle Man said. "How much will it be again?"

Aha! He is paying him off! I knew it! Now I really needed to see what was in that box. Maybe radio active stuff? Or big bombs or something? Or poison! The possibilities went on….

Goggle Man's back door was open! Foolish boy. Doesn't he know never to leave doors open when he was planning evil plots and stuff? Sheesh.

Bummy and I ran into the house using the sneakiness to our advantage. We crouched by the counter and watched as Goggle Man took the box from Pizza Guy. He walked over to the counter and set the box down, before going back over to Pizza Guy, getting something out of his pocket. Big mistake, evil villain!

I jumped to my feet and stood on my toes. I was hardly tall enough to reach the box, but I did it. With Bummy helping me, I took the box into Goggle Man's living room and opened it, expecting the worst. Huh. How weird. Pizza. Maybe I should taste some to make sure it's not poisoned….

"Thanks," I heard Pizza Guy say.

The door closed and I heard footsteps, but I was too attached to the pizza to notice that Goggle Man stood behind me, watching in amazement. I guess he didn't know how sneaky I was.

"Chelsea!" he gasped.

I spun around and saw him standing there, pizza sauce on my face. "…Hi, Goggle Man."

"...Scrub Girl…isn't it past your bedtime?"

I shrugged.

"That's it, young superhero. I'm calling your father."

I gasped in horror. It looked like I had a whole new mission.

*Author's Note: This was an assignment for an 11th grade literature class. Scrub Girl is defining a cultural hero.