English teacher. I know this is long, and I know it's odd, but please, read it. Oh...and you know
who you are...you really do have to promise not to leave. Please review, it feeds my muse. Who
may be dead anyway. Flame away, I won't restrict your opinions.
- - - -
... g
Are you listening to me?
Open your eyes if you are.
You should look at people when they're talking to you.
How many times have I told you that?
And stop smiling. Is something funny?
Listen.
Last night I had a dream.
I dreamed that you left me here,
and I was afraid, because without you
I didn't know who I was.
I didn't know what to do,
Who to be.
I realized that I lived through you,
And without you, there was something missing.
And I was scared because
I knew I could never get it back,
No matter how hard I tried.
I dreamed you went somewhere I could never follow you to,
And I tried so hard because it hurt when you left.
But I went looking for that piece of me
all over the world
for many, many years,
until I came back here and realized
you were right where I left you.
But then I found I didn't want to go after you,
Because I was afraid of that, too,
And I couldn't think of you wanting me to be afraid.
I dreamed that I went to your grave everyday,
And some of the others cried,
You know who,
But I couldn't cry because
I only cried for you, and you were gone.
I dreamed that I was never sad there,
In the old sunny cemetery,
Because you weren't there to be sad for.
Just a body, just what remained of a shell
for a bright soul.
I dreamed I was angry,
and that I fought hard against a world
that didn't seem to want to fight back,
fought against a great greyness that started the day you fell.
And I dreamed that I had no reason to live,
And I dreamed that I had no reason to die,
to breathe,
to stop,
to care,
to forget,
to see,
to be blind,
to be hurt,
to be emotionless.
Then the dream was over, and I woke up, just now.
And I realized why you can never, ever, leave me here,
And that I had to see you right away.
So now, you have to open your eyes and look at me,
Because I want to see you laugh at me
For being so stupid, and showing up here in the middle of the night.
You have to stop smiling like that, and move your head,
because I'm trying to clean up,
But you keep bleeding on the carpet.
-end-
. :smile for me?:.