Kelly seemed incredibly eager to share this information so I asked. "Really, what's that?"
The prescient girl buried her head in her hands as Kelly answered, "Chlamydia."
Just as I was about to ask Kelly if she was joking, the prescient girl looked up at me and shook her head solemnly to tell me that Kelly was being quite serious.
Kelly was still talking, "…I could call her something like 'Dia' for short. But you know I can't place it, but it sounds really familiar to me. I think maybe it's a name from the Bible or something."
There was a dull thud as the prescient girl banged her head on the table.
Richard was struggling to keep a straight face, "Yeah, Kelly it sounds really familiar to me too. I think there have been a few occurrences of Chlamydia in my family tree."
After a short uncomfortable pause, I decided that it was up to me to break the silence. "I've always liked the name Yeardley."
"My mom's name was Yeardley." Richard spoke without even a hint of sarcasm in his voice…
…so Kelly fell for it, "Really? That's a really odd name."
Another dull thud sounded from the prescient girl's direction.
"I think I've heard that one before too," Kelly continued.
"Was it in the Bible?" Richard asked innocently.
Kelly had no better luck picking up on irony than sarcasm, "No, that's not it. Isn't that the name of the girl who does the voice of Lisa Simpson?"
Richard and I were both surprised at this sudden insight. "It is actually, for some reason I always like that name," I said.
"Aren't you afraid she'll get made fun of?" Kelly asked. "I mean the other kids will call her, like, 'Yardstick,' or something."
"I appreciate your concern for my possible future daughter's social status, but I don't think anyone would torment a girl just because her name was Yeardley."
Richard raised his hand with the speed of one of those annoying front-row-kids from grade school. "I would."
Seeing that I wouldn't get any support from Kelly or Richard, I directed my attention to the prescient girl. "You're being awfully quiet over there. What do you think about this?"
The prescient girl lifted her head, and I watched as her forehead turned back to its original color from where it had been pressed against the table. She used that penetrating stare on me, her eyes burning a hole in the space-time-continium itself and peering into my future.
"You're not going to name your daughter 'Yeardley.' Your wife won't let you."
Everyone looked at me expectantly.
"Well, I suppose I could use it as a middle name. How about: Karen Yeardley Sampson?"
"It doesn't bother me a bit, she's not going to be my daughter."
The prescient girl spoke with her usual deadpan certainty and I couldn't help but feel a bit saddened by her proclamation.
Kelly stood up, "Well, its time for me to get back to work, let me know how it works out, Matt."
"Good luck with the whole Chlamydia thing." Richard spoke loud enough for Kerrie to hear as she walked to the table.
"Wow, that's terrible Kelly. I'm sorry to hear that," Kerrie said as she took Kelly's former seat and removed her Sandwich-Hut hat.
The prescient girl spoke up before Kelly could shape her face into her trademark confused expression. "We'll explain later."
Kelly seemed satisfied as she pulled her hair into a ponytail, put her hat back on, and resumed her station behind the cash register.
Kerrie had no interest in the earlier conversation and immediately asked her usual question. "Do you have anything new for me to read?"
"I don't have anything finished at the moment. I've been working on a few new ideas," I said.