A/N You thought I was done, didn't you? ** Cackle** Yeah right!

Whatever happened to the pie? You ask me. Well, you've heard the monkey's story. Now for that other chief character. Where we step in, the pie is under a large space rock, smoldering in its shiny tin. It had been a couple years since the monkey turned into a human.

Pie:.. Mmph!

Yes, after all that time, the pie was given the gift of speech! He was also given muscles, apparently, for he wriggled out from under the meteor. Blinking in the sunlight (he must have eyes as well now) he started crawling across the ground. Soon he reached the desert you heard about last chapter. There he cam across a man. This man was very strange- his name was Menes, the first pharaoh of Egypt! He wore a funky white hat. When the pie found him he had just conquered lower Egypt.

Menes: Hmm, what's this? (picks up pie) Why, it must be the crown of Egypt! I'll combine it with my OTHER crown.

(A/N If you're confused right now, get a history book and learn more about Egypt. By the way, the pie happens to be red for the sake of our little tale.)

So Menes picked up the soggy old pie and put it on his head. What he did not realize is that the pie had mind-control tendrils that could take over your brain on his tin. Menes ruled for years, oblivious to this. At last, the tendrils started their work. The king was taken over by a pie! Oh dear! The first thing the pie did was order his name to be changed to Pharaoh Fruit Roll Up. Nobody knows this because after he died it was never recorded. Pharaoh Fruit Roll up worked for late hours in his secret tower, inventing some sinister object.

Years later, Menes' body died. Not the pie, though. He stayed dormant until the twentieth century. There he brought out his sinister object- the feared Fruit Roll Up! He mass-marketed it and got really rich, dying his hair platinum blonde. Then he invented the ever-popular Dumb Blonde Joke. Then around 1992 he mysteriously disappeared. Who knows where he might turn up?

A/N This was random. I think it might have to do with that Mountain Dew I had in math class. Do the Dew! But it's okay, I had Subway!