Not Alone

Sitting beside a cold, grey wall,
Telling myself that I won't fall,
How can it be that you're gone?
I think I knew it all along,
How cold the wild wind could blow,
And how far your tenderness could go,
But yet I am here without you,
Listening to things I thought I knew,
With my head in my hands,
No one understands,
What's it's like to be at home,
In a world where I'm not alone.

Is it stupidity that brought me here?
Or just reality that became my fear?
Sorrow brings no grief to me,
My bones are chilled & blood runs free,
Can it be that I no longer live?
Because to you I have nought to give,
But the gentleness I feel inside,
I can be your guard and guide,
Lost and confused,
Deserted and bruised,
Trying not to fall apart,
While I'm not alone in my heart.

Climbing the mountain that fate wrought,
Sleeping in the misery that I brought,
Is it kindness that I see in you?
Or is it deception in your eyes so blue?
Closing my eyes so that I'd remember,
Clenching my fists to stop the anger,
I feel it all around my soul,
I wish it were you whom I could hold,
The sands of time,
The filth and grime,
They don't hold me back from loving you,
I'm not alone; I have other things to do.

It seems I have no other friend,
But the light that shines in tunnel's end,
It's not a comfort, but it's all I have,
I still can hear you speak and laugh,
The memories are clear inside my head,
Although hope lingers by a thread,
Desperately, without security,
I hold onto whatever I see,
Whether it's one I know,
Whether it be friend or foe,
Or if my eyes deceive my mind,
I'm not alone nor am I blind.

I thought life was meant for someone else,
Someone more deserving than myself,
A person who can actually be free,
But I thank whoever gave it to me,
That I'm not alone, I have you here,
And now I have nothing to fear.
I'm not alone.