She heard footsteps from behind, and then there he was, standing in the rain beside her. He spoke first.
"Hey. How are you?"
"Fine," she replied out of habit. "You?"
"Wet. What are you doing standing out here in the rain?"
"Just thinking. What are you doing?"
"The others sent me to check on you. Are you ok? You've been really quiet all day."
The rain fell. She looked away.
"Yeah, of course I'm ok."
".. What's wrong?"
How do you answer the question "what's wrong?" when nothing's right? She was glad it was raining. She hoped the tears on her cheeks would look like raindrops. "The weather just suits my mood today, that's all."
Something in her was screaming 'tell him everything!' and something else was screaming 'no, no, he can never know!'
"What's got your mood so rainy, then?" he asked good-naturedly.
"Maybe I'm just lonely."
"I told you you need a boyfriend!"
"I don't think you really understand."
"So make me." He said, suddenly serious.
"Some things just can't be explained in words." She quipped, making an effort to be light-hearted. He sighed and turned away abruptly.
"Nope, I can never ask a serious question and get a serious answer from you."
She felt something contract painfully inside her.
"Don't say that."
"It's true, isn't it? I'd like to think you're one of my closer friends."
"You are. I just don't know how to explain some things, honestly, that's all."
"It can't be that hard."
She looked at him in amazement. He truly had no idea.
"You don't really have anything to be sad about, do you? I mean." he faltered a bit at the look on her face, but then continued. "Maybe you don't want a guy! You don't know how tough it is, you don't know what it's like to be in love."
Suddenly she exploded. She was inches away from him and hissing at his face.
"Don't - you - dare. Don't you dare say that to me. I know how tough it is to be in love. How could you say that to me. I have cried myself to sleep every night for so long, so long-" she broke off here, unable to keep her voice under control any longer.
He looked rather gobsmacked.
"I don't understand. How long have you felt this away about this person?"
She took a deep breath.
"Almost two years." She answered quietly.
"Wow." He started to laugh. She quite simply could not believe her ears. "Why are you laughing?" "Sorry," he said, managing to get himself under control. "It's just that - I mean - I never thought that you would - I didn't think you were the sort of person - who is it anyway?"
"You laughed at me. I knew it." She turned and started to walk away, but he grabbed her arm. She stopped where she was, standing motionless in the rain facing away from him, tears pouring down her face.
"Who is it?! Come on, tell me!" she could still here the laughter in his voice. Something inside of her was as cold as ice. She spun around to look at him, her nose almost touching his.
"You. You, alright?! There, I said it." She was yelling at him now. "You never realised. For two years, you never realised. I smiled for two years because of you. The sun rose and set, the world spun, because of you. I have cried myself to sleep for two years because of you. And all you can do is laugh."
"But I - I don't -" He looked bewildered.
She meant to yell at him, she really did. But instead it came out as a whisper with the sound of heart break in it.
"I am in love with you."
She left him standing there, turned, and walked away through the rain.