Thoughts in a House

"What am I doing here?" Tyler asked the silent, thick air that surrounded him in his musty house. "What is happening to me?"

It had been five hours since the restaurant incident, and he was considerably more insane now than when he had left. He wasn't talking to shadows or imaginary friends or anything like that. He was talking to himself. He understood that there was no one with him, but he addressed that nonexistent someone continuously.

"Do you know?" he asked. "Please tell me you do."

He realized the pathetic nature of this pleading, but that didn't stop him from pleading.

"I wish you would tell me," he continued. Then he said something completely unrelated to anything that was on his mind. "Death, destruction, brains, capacity."

He twitched and started worrying for his sanity. "Gotta get off this merry-go-round. Computer screen."

He clenched his teeth. "What's happening to Robert's here!"

He held out a hand to an empty doorway with a smile on his face. "Good God what am I saying? DVDs are more advanced than CDs."

He brushed his greasy hair out of his face. Too much. He didn't know what had triggered this extreme fuck-up in his head, but it was too much. He couldn't stand it. He didn't think he could.

"Party at Mike's! He's got hard lemonade!" he shuddered and put his hand over his mouth. He didn't want to say anything else like that. It was too much.

"This is too much… I don't want this."

He gripped his lips even tighter.

He had to piss, but he couldn't. He had this creeping fear that this world was just a veil pulled down over his eyes and that he was actually in another place around other people. He feared that if he went and took a piss in the toilet, the veil would be pulled up and he would see that he was pissing on some old woman's head… or the main course of a big meal. No, he was scared to take a piss. He was scared to shit. He was scared to do anything but sit there and talk to himself. In fact, he was scared of that, too.

"Too much. Too much. Too much, too much. Too much too much too much too much too much too much too much too much too much. Goddamn this is too fucking MUCH!"

He fell forward out of the chair and rolled up into a ball on the ground. "Make it stop. Books are fun to read. Make it stop. "The Matrix" sequels really were good, yet people were just really confused by their endings. Make it stop make it stop! Edward Norton is the best actor ever. Make it STOP!"

He didn't even realize he had pulled a great deal of hair out of his head. He wouldn't have cared even if he had realized. It was far too much, and he wanted it to stop.

"I want to kill Kate." He stopped rocking after he said that. He stared at the ground as he contemplated what he had said. He found that he really did want to kill Kate. "Insanity's just a perspective! Insanity's just a perspective! Insanity is just a PERSPECTIVE!"

Tyler thought that if he was in a movie, each time he had said 'insanity's just a perspective' the camera would've closed in on him a little more. "Make it stop…" he pleaded.

He looked around and stood up. He brushed himself off and started chuckling. He stopped abruptly and sat back down on the chair. Each movement was done jerkily.

"Sons of bitches trying to take me lucky charms," he muttered. "I oughta bust caps in each of their asses."

He started chuckling again. He felt that if he didn't get it under control soon he wouldn't be able to stop.

"Stop what?"

Stop what indeed.


Gotta get off this merry-go-round.

"I want…"

Boom -ba -dum -da.

"To kill…"

Bap -bap -bap -bap.

"Kate. Seven hundred eighty seven."

Then the chuckling turned to outright laughter. In his empty house he laughed as he became more and more out of touch with reality, and descended into the deep wells of insanity.


Hey, MorbidMan here. Sorry for such a short chapter. It doesn't have any other purpose other than to show that Tyler's losing his mind. And when he said "Seven hundred eighty seven" that's how many words there are in this chapter combined with this AN. Please review. Please don't complain about the length, since I've apologized for that.

"I'm grateful, for everything that you've done for me. But this is too much… I don't want this." - Narrator "Fight Club"