I thought his blood was in my ears.
Showering, why? because it had to be done,
had to put on that show for the town
of how strong I was and how noble my suffering.
couldn't stink and have bedhead now could I?

But I thought, for a moment, that the purpose
was to wash off the blood.
Yes, there was some on my arm from her watch,
that was all. Some psychotic hallucination, though
*he was in the car and I wasn't, remember?*
and you'd think they'd take a q-tip, clean him up, but
dried blood
was still flaking out of every orifice.

the cold stars didnt' care when I stared at them tonight.
I couldn't see the trees except in blurred sillhouette.
They were small, and far below me.
Nearby was the cold cement slope
littered side of an unfamiliar highway-
fresh chilling comforting breeze.
I had to leave soon though.
The cars were speeding by.