Disclaimer: All I own is the characters, places, and plot. However, as the reader you own nothing. I pity you.

Chapter 1
In Which Important Characters Are Introduced

First of all, I would like you to know that this story takes place in one of the most boring places in the world, a school. Yes, ladies and gentlemen and other strange creatures, this is another one of those dumb, boring stories that take place in a school. It has children, teachers, principals, and all that other rubbish. It begins with an ordinary introduction that describes a place and is basically like any ordinary book. However, the characters in it and the things they say and do are not ordinary. So, without further ado, here it is. Well, not here here. It's more of a down THERE sort of here. So technically it's there, not here, so go read it already!

A little further down.

Not much further now.

Our story begins in a boarding school. And in this boarding school there was a girls' dormitory. It wasn't just any dormitory. It was their dormitory. I bet you're wondering who they are. Aren't you? Well, they were a bunch of unpopular girls who were a bit, well, weird. Or at least they thought so. Everyone else thought they were strange and overly quiet. Of course, a few of them were thought to be psychotic, but that was simply because they acted strange and danced in the hallways when they thought nobody was around. However, the people who did this did it simply because they thought it was fun. Do you know how much fun it is to dance to imaginary rock music in an empty Victorian hallway? Well, I'll tell you how much fun it is: tons! However, due to being stuffy and stuck-up people, they failed to realize this and wasted their lives getting rich and consequently marrying other rich people. But most importantly, these girls were not British. Now if you don't mind, I'll just continue writing frantically before I go off on a tangent and forget what I was going to write.
These girls were known among themselves as Turtle, Monkey, Horse, Paprika, and Giraffe. Aquarius, Devil Girl, and Penguin come later on in the story. Turtle, although almost silent among her fellow students, was an outrageously strange type of person. The type that you might see on the street and think was insane. However, she wasn't. She simply liked to act strange, because it was fun to do so and see the looks on peoples' faces afterwards. Of course, if anybody came near her long, thick, dark brown hair, they wouldn't live to see the next day.
Monkey was fairly quiet among most people, but spoke quite often among her friends. She was almost as strange as Turtle, obsessed with fire, and couldn't dance.
Horse was silent among people, and rarely even spoke among friends. She had plenty of common sense and made straight A's. She was the smartest one in all her classes and criticized Turtle when she was lazy with her work.
Paprika was, for lack of better terms, blonde. She was always dancing about and liked to talk with a British accent.
Giraffe looked almost exactly like Turtle until she got contacts and a hair cut. She was a rap fanatic and wouldn't mind beating the most popular boy in school to a pulp just because he was a jerk.

Now that you have at least an extensively vague idea of what they were like, let us join these, as Turtle called them, Freeks. They were hanging out in their dorm and finishing what was left of their homework.
"I can't believe Mr. N. gave so much homework! It's like he hates me or something!" Turtle hated geography and had long ago decided that it was just another brainwashing conspiracy. Mr. N. just happened to teach geography and was therefore evil.
"Listening to you complaining makes me glad that I'm not in any of your classes." Horse was trying to get Turtle to shut up as always.
"Whatever." For once, it worked. Turtle put on her headphones and began listening and sitting/dancing while mouthing the words to "The Sickness".
Horse shook her head and went back to her Pre-Algebra homework.
Paprika came down from the top bunk of her bunk-bed and practiced her ballet dance.
Monkey was writing a poem about sharp and pointy objects.
Giraffe however was rapping along to "Rabbit Run", a song she had to listen to at least once a day.
Suddenly somebody knocked at the door. Paprika answered it with a smile that looked like a McDonald's worker asking you if you wanted to super-size that order. "Hello," she said in a British accent.
The person at the door was just the mute postal worker who brought the mail to each dorm. Or at least they thought he was mute. He never talked to them. He held up a package for Turtle.
Turtle hurriedly jumped down from her bunk and claimed the package, thanking the mute postal worker and returning to her bunk.
The postal dude held up a lumpy envelope for Monkey.
Monkey claimed her package, thanked the mute, and returned to her bunk bouncily.
Apparently everybody had gotten something, so the postal guy threw Paprika's and Giraffe's envelopes to them and handed Horse her package. Bowing, he exited the dorm.
The girls excitedly ripped open the envelopes and packages simply assuming that they were from their families.