Why is there so much sorrow?

In my life

I try slip out

But there is no escape

Abuse flying through the air

It seems like it's all intended for me

Hurtling for the weak one

Like they know I'm weeping inside.

My insides are crying out

No one is helping

They all walk by,

Strutting through their perfect lives.

I'm lying here crumpled

No one stops

They are deaf to my cries of pain,

Blind to my bleeding

I slowly stand with tears running down my cheeks

My pain is washing down my face

I emerge through the crowded hallway

Only to find more sorrow

Then I spot something

Could it be finally a glimpse of color?

Finally could there be

No more pain

No, I am hallucinating

Trying to ignore the fact that no one cares

Trying to believe that there is a sliver of good left

But I am fooling myself

Maybe I can create my own escape

A physical pain that I brought on myself

A release of everything, through my blood

My own way of suffering

I found my dad's razor

I found my source of relief

I sliced the skin on my wrist,

Cringing at the pain

I looked at my wrist and saw what I did

Blood dripping from my fresh wound

The pain is unbearable

The pain is numbing

I smile at what I have done

I have a release

Controlled pain to free my fears

I am no longer weak.

I have my scars, my razor wounds,

They show that I have been through so much

I press the razor in harder and harder

Making imprints to show the world.

The razor marking my wrist,

Is my paintbrush on a canvas.

Showing the world what I feel,

Exposing my pain to them.

No one knows what I am going through,

My pain is closing me off from them.

I might as well be dead.

Maybe I should leave for good.

No one cares what happens to me anyway,

I'm just one lost girl in a lonely world.

Nobody understands what I'm going through,

Just feeling this horrible pain.

I lock myself in the bathroom,

Sitting on the counter with a choice

Should I live and continue to suffer

Or should I die, and end my desolation.

My heart begins to race,

I can feel the cold, harsh metal against my skin

I have power in my hand,

All I have to do is pull the trigger

Sweaty palms, shortness of breath

I bite my lip and tears are streaming down my cheeks

Slowly my hand tightens on the gun

I pull the trigger and hear a loud shot

I am watching from heaven now

My parents come running, they kick down the door.

My mother comes rushing to my side,

Letting out shattering sobs.

My father is standing there,

A lost look in his eyes.

How could this happen,

I was daddy's little girl.

I stand there watching

My mother is reading the note I left

My father is looking over her shoulder

His tears falling onto his dead little girl.

Hi mommy, hi daddy,

You know that I'll miss you

But I just couldn't go on

Secret after secret and lie after lie

Nobody knew how much pain I was in

Nobody figured it out

I couldn't stand it any longer

My life is much better now.