Long ago, before human times, in the solar system Xewphate of the galaxy Sol, there were three planets inhabited by a biologically similar yet enmitous race of life forms which called themselves the wise ones, or Wys for short. Effcap, the first, was a small planet ruled entirely by a small aristocracy, the Egroegs. They divided themselves into two groups, the Pinks and the Greens, and held contests regularly in which lower-class citizens chose the richer group to win valuable prizes. Note that there was no real reason they did this; it was largely just because it made them feel important.

Uscom was the second. Ruled by an impressively powerful corporation, the citizens of this planet were carefree and hard workers-namely because they didn't know any better. Their ruling body's PR firm took care of trivial things like thinking for them, and they were told they were happy.

Totfas was the last. Its ruler also called itself an Egroeg, but unlike on Effcap, one man held full power. His citizens made no claim of happiness,. but their ruler being all-powerful, there wasn't a lot they could do about it.

Xewphate was looked down upon by its neighboring systems, especially Lacal. Lacal had only one planed, a large one called Libsoc. Many of its citizens considered it a paradise. Here, people could live how they pleased, practice the religion of their choice or none at all, be free to have their own opinions about whatever they pleased without being harassed, and enjoy endless supplies of necessary commodities such as health care and music by The Offspring from a committee of the Treasury that they paid a percentage of their total net worth to every year. Their government consisted of a Manager elected by the people for ever district. This manager let the meetings in which every citizen could vote on important issues. The people of this humble planet were largely pacifistic, so they declined to get involved in the affairs of Xewphate. The tried to avoid the topic.

Inevitably, however, the Libsocians' denial was shattered. Effcap had declared all-out nuclear war on Totfas. Uscom, desperate for attention, was aiming inter-galactic ballistic missiles at Lacal's star.

The Libsocians debated what they should do in a singular meeting held at their capital, Awotto.

"Bomb them all into oblivion," suggested an older man. "wipe them out. Let's face it. They're barbarians."

"But what about those poor citizens?" asked a younger one who was widely known for obsessively considering other points of view. "I mean, if you were one of them, how would you feel?"

"They're brainwashed morons. With all due respect, they' d rather be dead than have to live under our kind of government. I'd be kinder just to kill them all."

"Not the citizens of Totfas. They're just oppressed. And the others… they must be worth saving. They're people, and all people deserve to live."

"Are they now," asked an intelligent yet judgmental citizen. "If any of us were under their governments, why, we'd rebel! Whereas they just sit there and let it happen."

"But you don't know what you'd' do!" You're not in the situation."

You're point being?"

"That you can't just assume they're lower life-forms because they're oppressed! We can't pass moral judgment on any person's actions, because we can't know what, exactly, are their reasons behind their actions. How can you even say that?"

"It's a free country and I don't know that you have the right to question my motives." He paused. "But very well, smart-ass. What do you propose we do?"

"I…" He thought. "I am completely and utterly confused."

"Confused. You're confused," he replied scathingly. "Is that your response to everything? Have you ever successfully made a decision in your life? Or are you still teetering on the ledge of indecision, living your life by what you feel like today, making decisions based on primitive impulses?" He turned to look at the stunned crowed. "Is that what this place's come to? A shithole filled with indecisive assholes like him, afraid to make a decision they might regret later? Well, you know what I think? I think you're all just a bunch of morons who think they can control humanity. Make the masses equal, you say. Give them a whole bunch of useless responsibilities, let them make their own decisions, and they'll be happy. Well, you're wrong. I was born here forty years ago and aI'lve ahated it ever since. People need competitiotn. You're as dumb as the bastards from Uscom and twice as pompous. Because you know who's got the right idea? Effcap, that's who. And I'm gonna go there right now, to the land where the people who know how to work the system succeed and useless shitheads fail. To the land of the free." With that he stormed out.

"Whew, glad he's gone," sighed the confused man. "I have never heard anyone with such little creativity for expletives!"

Meanwhile, on Effcap, the Pink and Green divisions were holding a pointless discussion on mechanical pencils.

"Give everyone a 0.7mm pencil and TTHEL LEAD WILL NEVER BREAK AGAIN!" One side of the room cheered and clapped.

"But, with our 0.5mm pencils, your line will be more precise, and YOUR WORK WILL BE MORE EFFICIENT!" The other side screamed with patriotic joy.

Two youn Effcapists looked down at the pencis they were holding. "Weren't things fine the way they were before this whole pencil thing started?"

"Yeah." Her companion stared vaguely. "That's.. that's right! Maybe we should do something about it!"

"Like… what?" the female Effcapist respinded. "What should we do?"

"Let's invent the protest song."

"How do we do that?"

"First, you need a cause."

"We have a cause."

"Then you need to write a song about it."

"That's illuminating. How do you do that?"

"Um... you need... to write a POEM!"

"Why?"

"Because that'll be the words. And then you have to... uh... have guitar music! And drums!"

"Wow. This will be a turning point in the history of Effcap. I'll write a story about it!"