Chapter 44

Justin had to admit that it was a little weird that he was in love with Marie, much less considering marrying her. After all, he had known her for approximately a month. Every time he thought about that tiny amount of time in which he had come to be so attached to her, he thought that perhaps he was a little but crazy, and maybe even a lot crazy. The only thing that didn't stop Justin from checking himself into an institution was the fact that he was pretty sure Marie felt the same way. As long as he wasn't the only one, he could handle the craziness of their relationship.

Oh God, Marie, he thought. What have you done to me?

The truly unfortunate thing was that Justin knew exactly what she had done to him, and that there was no way of getting out of the situation. He didn't know if the tempest of emotions would continue wrecking his mind forever, but he hasn't certain that he could handle them for even a few more weeks. Justin was desperate to find some way to bring all of this to an end, but the only end he could think of was one involving himself, Marie, and a church.

That wasn't really very comforting, since he knew that reasonable Marie was probably not coming to the same conclusions.

Justin at least knew he had the support of Katia, who seemed to be on his side. As much as she probably didn't want Marie to leave New York, Katia seemed to get that he really, really, loved her. Maybe it was all the desperate crazy-man talk he had been doing lately, or his sincere eyes, or whatever, he didn't care, as long as Katia was going to help out. Marie trusted her friend more than anyone else, and Justin knew she would listen to her, even if she couldn't believe what she was hearing.

But really, why be so pessimistic? Maybe Marie had come to the conclusion that she should quit her job and her past life, and come join Justin out and raise about five kids. And maybe she thought of that all on her own, and was just waiting to tell him because she didn't want to scare him away. That was probably it.

Dios mio, I am crazy.

Katia was sitting on the couch next to Marie, thinking about how she should approach the any part of a conversation involving Justin. Marie had been surprisingly close-mouthed about the whole situation, and had not really been forthcoming when Katia asked something as simple as, "Did you guys have a good time?" after they went out.

Katia, putting on her psychologist hat, decided it had something to do with the fact that Marie thought talking about everything would make it more real, and therefore harder for her to deny that she was madly in love with him and it would kill her to leave him. Marie could be funny about things like that sometimes, but Katia usually knew how to get around her and make her talk about what was bothering her.

However, after making the promise to Justin to help him make Marie realize that her future was right here, Katia had not talked to Marie about the situation at all, hoping that Marie would give her some sort of hint as to what she was thinking about. Her plan, it seemed, was not working at all, and although Katia could see Marie's mind working constantly, Marie never said a thing.

Katia was basically going crazy, hoping, at this point, that Marie was too. It would serve her right, after putting Katia through all this stress. But Marie, aside from her constant pondering, appeared to be quite at ease. Katia knew that there was a time for everything to end, and decided to make conversation, and be quite blunt about it.

"So…are you having as a good of a time as you hoped?" she asked.

Marie didn't even turn from the TV to look at her. "Oh yes, everything has been wonderful."

"I'm glad. It's good that you don't regret coming out here. Especially after you made me come with you," Katia said, hoping to at least inflict some guilt upon the girl.

She had no such luck. "Oh please. If you were having a terrible time, you would have made that quite clear. In fact, I think you are enjoying yourself."

Katia decided to change tactics. "You know, I am having a great time. People always think it's a joke, but modeling can be quite stressful. I mean, really. I deserve a little vacation every now and then. In fact, you know that gig I have coming up? Well, I was just thinking I should skip it and stay here."

That got Marie's attention. "I didn't know the country lifestyle would grow on you so quickly," she said, raising her eyebrows at her suddenly enthusiastic friend. "Any particular reason?" she added.

Katia just smiled widely at her. "Oh, no, nothing really. Not anything like what you've got."

Marie blushed and averted her gaze. "Well, that is a different situation," she said. Katia didn't really know what Marie was talking about- a different situation from what? She decided to wait a moment to see if Marie expanded upon her point. Sometimes, it was better not to pressure Marie. That proved to be the case.

"I mean, how long am I supposed to stay here?" asked Marie. "Like, when do I decide to go home? I have to go eventually."

"Technically, you don't," Katia replied frankly. She looked Marie in the eye. "Marie, you are my best friend in the world, and that means something because I know people in many countries. I want nothing more than for you to stay near me for your whole life, and never have anything change. But not if it is going to make you sad! I want you to be happy, deliriously happy, and I am starting to think that the person who is going to make you that happy is right here."

Marie sighed. "I was hoping you wouldn't say that. It makes everything so much harder for me to think about…I know what you are saying is true! But I somehow can't reconcile that with the smart part of my mind that is telling me to forget about all this, even after everything that has happened."

"Do you honestly think you could forget one moment you spent with Justin? If you do, then you do not love him as much as I thought you did. If you could forget all of this, then I would say that we are doing a foolish thing and that we should go home. But I don't think that you could forget any of this, and this if you left, right now, or ever, you would be miserable for the rest of your life."

"You don't make things any easier, do you? Maybe I would. But still…to give up what I have worked so hard for…"

"Give it up? Not ever. Just go in another direction. Why do you need to give up your dream of designing clothing just because you are not in Manhattan? Why do you need to give up your independence and all the things that Justin already loves about you? There is no reason. You would not have to be a different person, or do something you hated. You would not be giving up your life! You would be living it!" Katia was frustrated with Marie's refusal to see that she could still be who she had always wanted to be, but with so much more in her life. Having Justin would make Marie's life so much better, so much richer, and Katia was shocked that she couldn't see that for herself.

"Look, Marie, how do you think your life will be if you go back home, and never speak to Justin again? Will you be happy then? Will you miss him? What will your future bring you if you don't let yourself be with him, and love him?" Katia knew she was pushing Marie, but the girl needed to be shown something. She needed t realize that she couldn't just turn her back on something like this- something that Katia had secretly hoped for her whole life.

Marie turned slightly teary eyes to Katia's face. "Oh, I would miss him forever, and nothing would ever make me feel better about it." She looked into her hands. "I think I would miss him even if I had never met him, because I would know that something was wrong."

Katia leaned forward, gentler now. She put her hands on Marie's knees. "Well then, what are you doing wasting your time with me? I love you, girl, but you are an idiot sometimes," she added, laughing.

"You shut up," Marie giggled. "So what if I'm an idiot. At least I'm not as stupid as you!" She threw a pillow at Katia.

"Ooh, I am going to get you know. Forget about everything I just said. I am going to kill you before you get a chance to be happy!"

The two women ran out of the room, laughing the whole way.

Ugh, once again with the super slow update. Once I make myself write something, it is usually quite easy…it's just that I am insufferably lazy, and a procrastinator. Whatever. At least I got another chapter out. I try very hard to make sure I don't get into the "month without an update" trend, cause then I really get bad.