7The Clandestine Life
It's dark. When it's dark I get scared. I know they're out there. Waiting. Watching. I know because I've seen them. I've seen them in my dreams. Watching, waiting, wanting…me. Who am I? They don't care. I scare them because I can see. They fear me because I might tell. I won't of course. How could I? There is no one to trust. Your best friend might be one of them. The sweet old lady down the street could be working against you. You just never know. Such is my problem. The treachery runs to deep. The evil, to thick. I'll just sit back and watch. I've seen it all before but I can't turn away. I'm forced to watch it, to live it. Like so many other times before I will refuse to change the course. It will happen and I won't stop it. Maybe I don't know how? They force me to live in this easily escapable hell and I don't know how to free myself.
Much less the world.
"Billy!" Someone yelled from the kitchen downstairs.
"What ma?"
"Come on honey!"
Fourteen year old Billy closed the journal from which he was writing, placed the pen on top of the doodled on cover and trotted downstairs to fill his stomach with some much needed food.
"What are you doing in there?" Billy's mother asked when he arrived in the kitchen. The floral wall paper and accessories didn't really float Billy's boat, but his mom likes them and anything to keep her happy…
"I was just doing some homework mom." He brushed past his almost always depressed mother to open the pot and take a peek inside. "Gumbo?!" he said in disgust. "You know I hate gumbo." Living in the south of Alabama gave Billy plenty of time to change the way he feels about gumbo but he never did and as far as he was concerned he never would. "Bleck!"
"I wish you'd come out." His mom said, not letting him change the subject so easily. "I worry about you honey."
"Mom, there is nothing to worry about! I'm fine!" Billy was looking through the fridge for some left over ham or a nice cheese log to replace the gumbo. His mother hardly ever buys junk food for him to snack on anymore. "Didn't we have some vegetable soup?"
"It's been three years since the accident, darling…can't you just…give me a sign?" She was relentless. In reality Billy thought he had long ago gotten over the plane crash and it was her constant bickering that kept him from coming forward.
"Well, I'm going to shower and go to bed." He'd given up on the food hunt. Another hungry night.
Before Billy jumped in the shower he went back to his journal.
Not again! I will no longer let them push me around. I'm not their play thing anymore. If they want me…they can have me. But not unless they put up a fight…
…One hell of a fight.
Billy awoke early the next morning. It was Saturday which meant he didn't have to sit through Mrs. Vonbury's boring 9th grade English class. More over, it meant cartoons.
Ever since early childhood Billy would look forward to these cartoons. They've changed a lot since he was waddling around in dippers but Billy loved them just the same.
This week, repeats were on. Billy didn't mind. As he ate an overly ripped banana and watched the familiar images flash across the screen it never occurred to him that his mother was no where in sight.
The realization of an absent mommy didn't hit him until he was throwing away his banana peel. Probably still sleeping. He thought to himself, anxiety building.
Over the next half hour Billy stared blankly at the screen. Like bamboo his apprehension was growing by the minute. Thoughts began going through his dead. Bad thoughts.
Maybe they got her?!
OH MY GOD! They've got her and they're tearing her apart and I'm just sitting here.
As they rip off her arms and scoop out her insides I watch cartoons!
Why would they take her? It's me who knows. I am the one who sees! I'm the one who can ruin their plan! ME not her!
They're trying to make me co me forward. That's it. They're waiting for me to give in. They want me to admit all I know thinking that she won't get hurt if I do…
Maybe they won't hurt her if I come forward?
NO! She's already dead. Rotting away in a dirty sewer drain…at least what's left. They've always planned to kill us both. Those bastards have no mercy!
Billy was beginning to get hysterical. Heavy breathing and a cold sweat accompanied even more horrid thoughts.
I bet they tortured her first trying to get out of her what I know…
There is always a possibility they'd leave here unharmed. What if I don't act and they kill her because of that?
I can't let that happen…This is just what they want…Damn they're good.
Billy was starting to get up to phone the police when the back door opened, letting in the spring air, the sounds of dogs barking, and his mother.
She was standing on the other side of the door with dirt on her cherry red pants and gloves and a small gardening shovel in her hand. She loved the outside.
Oh thank God! Billy exhaled massively when he saw his dirt covered mother at the back door. His terrible foreboding was lifted.
His mother didn't say anything and the reason for this soon became clear. As she stepped across the threshold she heaved and let out a cough, dropping the shovel.
Billy stood dumbfounded; a state of paralysis washed over him like a summer sun, as his mother fell to her knees and sprayed the kitchen floor with blood from another cough.
Billy was then sprung from his stupefied gaze when he noticed the gardening trowel sticking out of her back.
Before young Billy could react to his mother's hemorrhaging all over the flower tiled floor, windows all over the house exploded. Glass flew at him from behind in the living room, from in front in the kitchen. Wood splinters littered the tile in the foyer as the front door also erupted.
From the windows and door came not only glass and wood but through each also came several men dressed in black and carrying an assault weapon.
Billy was too young and too much in shock to recognize the fire arm, but he knew it was deadly. As close to 14 armed men invaded Billy's house, he decided to run.
I knew it! They found me. I don't know how but the found me. Time for one hell of a fight.
Before Billy could get too far one of the black suited men caught him and knocked him out with the 500 volts of electricity coming out of his tsazer. The fight was over.
Billy awoke from a most wonderful dream with drool running down his left cheek. After batting and rubbing his eyes several times he realized it was Saturday morning, time for cartoons.
As Billy sat in his father's old chair wearing dirty pajama pants and eating an overly ripe banana, he watched his favorite cartoons. He didn't mind that they were repeats.
Can't have too much of a good thing
He didn't even realize his mother was no where to be seen until he was up out of his chair to throw out the banana peel. Crazy thoughts of murder and torture cruised through his body like Indy cars. Reaching a height of stress that Billy could not stand, he began to produce a cold sweat.
Finally, he got up to call the police when his mother walked through the back door. Billy stood stunned when she fell over and died with the gardening trowel sticking out of her back and a pool of blood under her stomach. Before he could react the windows all over the house exploded and he was taken, unconscious, by one of the many black suited armed men who came through them.
Billy awoke in his bed and after clearing his vision, he noticed it was Saturday. That meant cartoons. He watched the repeats alone as his mother was no where to be seen.
"Billy!" She said again
"Come on honey!" For the third time that day.
"What are you doing in there?" Everyday.
"I wish you'd come out." For three years.
"I worry about you, honey." It was a bad accident.
"It's been three years since the accident darling. Can't you just…give me a sign?"
In these last three years following the accident that killed her husband, Billy hasn't given his mother any sign at all. In these last three years, in fact, he hasn't done much of anything. In these last three years, Billy has been comatose.
The End
[A/N: Ok, here is the whole story…I think I worked out the bugs but I'm not sure. Maybe I just think they're worked out because I know what is supposed to happen…anywho, let me know if it's too confusing. I know I got confused with the repeats and where to stop them and whatnot. But, anyway…here it is, now please go and review it!]