2I told him… I really did. Are you paying attention to me bitch?
But did he pay attention?
NO!
Did he care?
NO!
I told him! I'm sorry, so sorry my angel.
I tried to tell you that you were my addiction, the ambrosia of the gods granted onto a worthless wretch like me.
I told you to stay away, to not get involved. But you persisted, YOU PERSISTED!
And like always I gave in to you.
I could never deny you anything, could I?
After all darkness must submit to light. And you were my light, my sanity, my very reason for being.
You made me realize I wasn't a wretched monster. You made me realize that I was a human and not a whore that they could trample upon.
The world denied me. It treated me like scum.
My own parents denied me love. I was the child 'not even a mother could love'. They raped me, tortured me and taught me their own trade, the trade of selling your body.
They turned me into a fucking prostitute at the age of five, only five.
Our fathers* raped me, tortured me.
But I bore the pain quietly.
I couldn't let them hurt you, couldn't let them touch you.
For, after all, you were my angel, my light, my lost innocence and how could I let them corrupt my innocence.
Thus I became your protector, your dark. And you, my light, became my sanity.
But I couldn't take it anymore, couldn't stand the pain anymore. Hell, I was human too.
So I killed them, I killed those bastards* and made it look like a double suicide.
Imagine a 13-year old killing off the two greatest businessmen in the world.
But then again no one would have believed me, would they?
After all, to the world they were two honest, working men.
Remember when even the police refused to believe us, despite those wretched burn marks.
Did you know that I still carry those?
After that came the will, the damned document declaring that I had to leave you to inherit my father's* corporation.
But I came back, didn't I?
Brought back that smile to your face. And brought the world to your feet.**
I still didn't expect you to love me though.
Hell, I was just happy that you'd still talk to me despite all the painful memories I must have brought back.
But I just couldn't stay away angel. Those five years away from you had been hell for me and I had to return.
After all, you were my addiction.
You didn't know but I had already fallen head-over-heels for you.
Then you met your first love. You were ecstatic. I still remember that smile on your face.
And even though it broke me, I was happy for you.
Yes, you heard right. That was what broke me. Not our fathers'* torture, not my parent's abuse, but the fact that you would choose someone else over me.
I knew I didn't deserve you, but I still believed that you might have at least spared me a moment's thought, just glanced my way once to see how I longed for you.
But that bastard hurt you, he left you.
Don't worry though. I took care of him.
Then it came. A string of new lovers, one after the other. And after each one I would loose a little part of me. Bit by bit there was hardly any part of me left that hadn't been shattered.
But I didn't complain. No. I held you while you cried, soothed you when you were upset, chased away the nightmares. I coerced you into believing that you were indeed worthy of being loved, chasing away that utterly preposterous notion from your otherwise brilliant mind.
And don't worry, I took good care of them too.
After all, I loved you, didn't I?
And I couldn't leave those alive who hurt my angel.
You know I always believed that there wasn't a deity up there.
Either that, or I had been chosen as one of the damned since I graced this earth.
And yet, somehow I started believing that there was a God up there.
You know why?
Because not only did he bring you into my life, but slowly though surely, I could feel affection for me had taken root in your heart.
And it grew, didn't it?
It grew into a beautiful cherry blossom tree?
Did you know that I loved cherry blossoms? I guess not.
I remember valentine's day that year.
You took me out to a restaurant and told me of your love.
I was so happy.
And yet so afraid at the same time.
For I knew I was obsessed with you.
After all, you were my drug.
But I was afraid that if you were to ever cheat on me, or betray me, catastrophe would result.
Hell, I believe that Armageddon might even come if either of the above were to occur.
Funny thing, Armageddon didn't come though the above came true.
But you reassured me.
You told me, then, that just as you were my drug, I was yours.
You told me that the self-concept that I had developed wasn't true. That I wasn't a wretched, ugly monster, unworthy of being loved by you.
You taught me then that I was human.
Remember our marriage and honeymoon?
You didn't want to become one with me till after our marriage. You said we could pretend we were virgins again and were going to give each other our innocence after marriage.
You know what's hilarious though?
It was only a few months ago.
You know what else is funny?
You want to know why I'm home so early?
I went to the doctor's today. Took a sick leave for the first time in my life.
Guess what I found out though?
I'm pregnant. I'm going to have your child.
Too bad though, it'll never be born.
Don't ask me why, no don't plead with me.
I've given into you enough. Listened to you too many times.
You see you got too close and from being an addiction you turned into sustenance, my life force, the very thing keeping me alive. The only way I could leave you now would be in a body bag.
I loved you and still do.
That's why when I came to your office to tell you the good news, to tell you that you were going to be a father, that the impossible had come true, I didn't freak out.
I didn't pull out my revolver even though I found you locked in the midst of a heated and passionate carnal embrace with that bitch.
See, I'm perfectly calm and collected.
So calm that I won't even give in to you today, not let you stray me away from this suicidal course.
Yes, suicidal not homicidal.
You remember what I did the first thing I saw you like this.
I cut myself with the bottle of champagne I had been carrying to celebrate the news.
Pinching wouldn't do, I had to draw blood to make sure that this wasn't just another nightmare, albeit the worst. You know they've plagued me forever. Oh well, they won't plague me anymore.
And then I asked you and the slut to meet me here, at our humble abode.
Our humble abode, what an irony.
Oops, I almost forgot. I got a gift for you. Turn around. See. Isn't it beautiful? I painted it with my own blood, my angel of light.
Funny thing. That's exactly what I wrote on the walls.
Can't even remember how many times now though.
Do you like that painting of yours with the angel wings and the halo? I made it extra special for you with the blood of our unborn child. So you can always remember it.
You see I didn't want it to experience suffocation as its mother's life supply slowly grew smaller. I didn't want it to experience pain slowly wracking its body if I were to just shoot myself. So I made sure to end its pain quickly and efficiently by slicing its stomach open.
Hmm, now what's left?
Ah, I just have to remove myself from this existence and your life so you can be happy. After all, that's what I always wanted, isn't it? No, don't look scared beloved angel. This .6 mm is a very beautiful piece of machinery.
I do want to linger though, sorry for the inconvenience, but I want to see your face till my last dying breath.
Oh, there it comes now, here's the angel of death.
Well, I guess this is goodbye, angel.
Maybe, I'll meet you on the other side.
"And in news today, police found the bodies of Mr. & Dr. Kaba-Takahashi in their mansion. The mansion had been set aflame apparently. It appears that Dr. Kaba-Takahashi was with child when she died. Evidently, both Mr. & Dr. Kaba-Takahashi committed suicide. Between the two of them the owned the entire business world. While Mr. Takahashi had originally owned and been the CEO of the largest corporation, Takahashi Corporation, in this country, Dr. Kaba had expanded her corporation, Tenshi Corporation throughout the world. The two merged their corporations and consequently took over the rest of the business world. They had no relatives and left behind no heirs. Both will be missed. Back to you, Tim."
* By fathers, the narrator here means her stepfather and that of her husband's who were brothers and had
adopted the two together, after the death of their parents.
** The narrator here is describing bringing the rest of the business world to merge with that of her
husband's and hence 'bringing the world' to his feet.