Once upon a time in a Kingdom just a little titch over, there was a Flapjack Man. Now, this was no ordinary flapjack man. Instead of the generic "Jack" common to all the flapjack men and women in the Kingdom, his name was, in fact, Sir Ronald Kingsley Donald Daffodilius Farkrupple. (The third.)
Young Ronald was a good, sturdy lad free of soggy elbows or a saggy behind, and he had two marvelous blueberry buttons planted firmly into his chest. He also was the leading force behind a very important job.
"Run, Run, as fast as you can, you can't catch me, I'm Flapjack Man!" Running from hill to marsh to evergreen forest, he would shout loud and clear. "Nobody can! I'm Flapjack Man!" Ronald excelled in this traditional role of Kingdom Crier. His top-notch boasting even earned him a third button, a cranberry, in another adventure we shall recount later.
However, in his early years, Ronald hadn't developed the keen hearing or wit that enabled him to escape from danger time after time. Instead he chose to shout and run, truly as fast as he flew up in the air behind him, so hard did his feet pound into the ground.
As he sped away one fateful day after a succesful boast in Glompf Swamp, Ronald failed to notice that his feet were crumbing more than usual.
In fact, as he stormed across a rocky outcrop on the North Shore, he didn't see the rather large hunks of top quality flapjack shredding off and flying into the distance. Worst of all, he didn't see the gigantic horde of assorted nasty insects gobbling these up in a most rude manner.
"I'm Flapjack Man!" He yelled joyously, "FU-LAP JACK MON!"
"I'm FlAAP-JaaaCk Maaaan!" Mimicked a beetle, pincers flashing in the sun. "Nanananananahhh, I'm Flaaap-jaaccckkk man!" Ronald slowed and turned, breathing heavily. He flushed a deep brown as he glared at the beetle in unfortunate tunnel vision.
"No hyphen," He hissed, tiny airpockets visibly rupturing his skin in barely controlled fury, "NOOOO HYYYYPPPHHEEENNN!" He charged the beetle without further ado, fully tackling the slimy creature. It was only after a moment of furious wrestling did Ronald notice painful little nips and pinches all over his body, from every direction.
"Wha-" He tried to stumble up, only to notice a huge black ant eating chunks from his neck. "Hey-GERROFF!" He wheeled in circles, only now noticing the hundreds of bugs literally eating him alive.

.To eventually escape by diving into the water. Luckily, the water belonged to an enchanted lake so Ronald was healed, and not soggy to boot.

And so ends the first adventure of our young hero-FLAPJACK MAN!