I'm not going to complain about the abundance of essays relating to gay marriage to be found on FictionPress. It doesn't bother me that every wannabe writer with an internet connection and the required brain mass to sign up for an account wants to scribble his opinion on the matter, because unlike some busybody whinybitches, I'm more than capable of not reading what I don't want to on my own time and authority. Plus sometimes I like reading something shitty so I can flame it. So it's all good: keep 'em coming. From each according to his ability to each his own. Or something.

But to get straight to business, I think both conventional sides of this debate (as with most others) are composed of would-be social engineers who's daddies never spanked the concepts of "mind your own fucking business" and "keep your fucking hands to yourself" into their asses. The lefties, as usual, want to have the power to force people to associate with and grant privileges to the entitlement junkies that populate their pet voting blocs. The right wingers, as usual, show that they are unprincipled, opportunistic socialists by obfuscating over inane semantics (well, I'm not opposed to civil unions, as long as they don't call it marriage). Fucking weasels, every fucking one of them.

"Marriage" is just people living together and calling it thus, maybe with a contract outlining what happens should things go sour. Anyone who pretends otherwise is living in a collectivist fantasy land where such things as "the common good" and "the will of the people" actually exist anywhere except as fallacious concepts in peoples' heads.

The government will not currently stop you homos from getting married. You can legally cohabitate, and I'm sure the state doesn't give a shit if you call yourselves married. It just won't grant you the privileges it grants state-recognized marriages. Big fucking deal.

Oh?

-"But, what if no-one in the community recognizes our marriage?"

So fucking what? You do, your partner does, and absent attempts at violence on the part of anti-homo brutes (see below for more on that) that's all that matters.

-"But what if other people think homosexuality is wrong?"

So what? Fuck 'em.

-"But what if other people say things that hurt our feelings?"

It's your fault that you even give a shit what they think.

-"But what if people assault us in the street? Or try to break us up when we're making out? Or vandalize our home?"

Carry a gun. Blow them away if they lay a hand on you or yours. Wash, rinse, repeat.

-"But, without a license-"

Stop.

You're institutionalized.

Nothing can save you. I certainly don't care to try.

-"But we need the government to force other people to give us special privileges like they do with hitched hets!"

That's like the argument that since them thar fat hicks got them some slaves, we should get ourselves some slaves too. Fucking roast in hell for all I care.

If you're going to give every boob with a ballot a say in your life you're never going to be free to do shit, because ehryfuckinbody is gonna want a piece of you. That's how this game works. Don't play it, you lose in the end.

So you want to get married to your same sex partner? Stop asking permission from the Lovecraftian horror we call The State—and just fucking do it.

That is all.