Excuses

I build my brick wall up with excuses
With false pretense, that amuses
I build it so no one can see
The lonely and beaten soul that is me
But you can see my soul through my eyes
And a black hole is where it lies
Gasping and Grasping for one last drop
Of pain familiar that will never stop
Each teardrop is bittersweet
Like the others they fall to my feet
Each one is in re use
As I use them to abuse

The knowledge of the excuses are becoming lame
They are becoming a childish game
I claim if only I could I would
I lie; it's not 'all good'
So many lies I've told me, myself, and I
But all the excuses are no longer a lie
That's who I am, that's all I know
I am empty without self-pity and woe
It is my fuel it is my gas
It fills this empty and broken mass

One step to far, I miss
I am falling into an abyss
Wanting something solid to lean on
Its just air, all else is gone
My heart is fallen
My soul is callin'
No one answers so I tighten the noose
It's just another lame ass excuse.

MEW.7/23/04.12:43am