Saved by the Bell

A/N: This is a monologue I wrote for a drama camp performance. And you probably understand how the narrator (you could say that it's me) is feeling. Enjoy!

*walks onto stage, sits down, and pulls out a book*

Ahhhh…my favorite English lesson: independent reading. It's the one rare time where I don't have to listen to Mr. Johnson drone on about absolutely nothing. I have my favorite book, quiet, a comfy chair, and plenty of time. What could possibly go wrong?

*begins reading the book, then jerks up after the sound*


What was that? *turns around, then turns back very quickly with a disgusted look on her face*

I wish I hadn't looked because I did NOT want to see that…A lot of nerve, really. Making out during class when a teacher could potentially walk in on you any minute.

Oh, good. Mr. Johnson has come in and he sees them. Then again, how could he not? HA! They're in trouble now! He asked them what they think they are doing, and they answered with "Enhancing our learning experience". Yeah, like he'll believe that one.

*watches empty space, looking happy, then suddenly takes on a look of horror*

I can't believe he bought that. And he told them to continue! If those two don't break away soon, their lips will have to be removed from each other surgically! How would you like to be responsible for that, Mr. Johnson?


I don't even want to know how that noise came about.


That tears it, I'm out of here. Mr. Johnson? I need to go to the nurse's office. Why? Because I think I'm going insane. Sit back down? Yes, sir. *walks back to seat*


Gross. I don't know how much more of this I can take! They'll have to put me on the funny farm, and I won't be able to have anymore independent reading and—


Oh, thank heaven! I can finally get out of here! *gathers up things, walks halfway across the stage, then stops*

One day I will write a book. On when public displays of affection simply are not acceptable. *looks around at audience*

Some people need it.

*walks offstage*

A/N: Okay, I hope you liked reading this, because I enjoyed writing it, sound effects and all. I performed it and it was a hit. *grin* Anyway, if you liked this review it and tell me why. If you didn't like it, review and tell me why anyway. I actually wrote a fan fiction version of this first, then adapted it and shortened for my own purposes. The other version is Harry Potter, with Hermione as the narrator. You can go read that if you liked this…here is the link: if you'll excuse me…