Rodney the Rat: Part II
This short piece was written in my English class. We were told just to write whatever we wanted. I saw a picture of a blue frog above the blackboard and I remembered a previous creative writing exercise where I wrote a story about Rodney the rat. Please note: The inner humour of this piece lies in reading the first task.
A Blue frog sat on the side of the creek slumped like an old man who has a few to many. Next to him sat Rodney the rat, reminiscing about times past. The blue frog, Jim held in his hand a bong. He lit it and smoked it, letting the smoke invade his thoughts.
"I remember when I was a young rat," Rodney said as Jim passed him the bong. "I lived in a house, and I met this guy, and I think the day I met him I must have been so wasted" Rodney laughed and inhaled and passed the bong back to Jim.
"When I was wasted, I looked at the guys leg, it was sexy, so I couldn't help myself and I just jumped on. He kicked and jerked to get me off, but I didn't mind, I like it rough. When he finally kicked me off, I ran to my hole, ah those were the days"
The Bong sat in Jim's blue lap. Jim was out cold, momentarily gargling drunken bong water. Rodney snatched the bong back, and began to pack more into the cone piece.
"Then one day I was scampering unseen in the kitchen, and the guys ankle was blown up like a balloon. Was he pregnant?"
Rodney lit up the bong and inhaled, and he started to fall deeper and deeper into his memory.
"I swear he was pregnant, not him, but his ankle. I did it. It was me, GOD DAMN IT!" he leaped up and shook his blue friend. "I was gonna have a kid to some guys god damn ankle" Jim just sat there, unmotivated, because he was asleep.
"Then I heard something" Rodney went back into a reminiscent trance "I looked back at the guys ankle, it sounded like a tear, he was having a rat-boy or something. I watched as out came some sort of reptile. Was it a fucking crocodile?!" Then Rodney tripped and rolled down the hill and nearly fell into the creek. He got back up and ran back to unconscious Jim.
"Then the crocodile grew, into a massive crocodile god." Rodney went to utter the next words of his drug-induced memory, but he fell back down into the creek and drowned.
Please note: references to drug-use were gained not from myself experimenting with such substances, but by observing friends. And I therefore do not condone the use of drugs.