Crying this sickness away

Emptying my stomach of memories

It makes me sick

The stuff I've done

The stuff I didn't do



How I wish

But wishing gets you no where

What can you do with the past?

Make a new future

But the past is still there

Haunting me

Reminding me of who I am

Never changing

This sickness won't stop

The memories won't end

I want to be numb


Nothing and everything

I can't cleanse myself

It's all over me

It's under my skin

I can't reach it

Driving me crazy from the inside

I just want to scream

And all of it will pour out

Like a pitcher of hot water

Burning, painful, putrid water