Jenny's eyes opened slowly adjusting to the light. She took a moment to remember where she was, the answer coming to her in the form of beige walls all around. 'Oh no' she groaned softly. She turned her body slowly, trying not to disturb the figure beside her. 'Oh shit.' She said under her breath as she took in the sight of the dark brown hair sticking out from the covers. Jenny began to move as slowly as she could towards the edge of the bed. She had one foot nearly to the floor and was ready to breath a sigh of relief when she felt something, a hand, move across the bare flesh of her stomach and a strong arm wrapped around her pulling her back into the bed.
"Where are you going?" He asked, his voice still thick with sleep. A familiar thrill ran through her body as a pair of soft lips started to kiss the column of her throat.
"I have a patient at nine." She said, unable to fight the power of the soft caresses. 'God I'm pathetic' she thought to herself.
"It's just gone six, go back to sleep for an hour."
"I can't or I'll be late." She said slipping out of his grasp and out of the bed. She found the shirt he had been wearing the night before on the floor and slipped it on.
"You're the only psychiatrist I know who works on a Saturday." He called out as she shut the bathroom door behind her. "Most people like their weekends."
"Trust me," came a muffled replied, "If the others knew how many people there were willing to pay double just so they could speak to someone, they'd only work weekends."
"What could be so important to talk about, but not important enough for business hours?" The door opened and Jenny stood brushing her in just her underwear, looking for her jeans. "Oh you know, businessmen needing a medical excuse for cheating on their wives repeatedly. They can't make sessions on weekdays because the secretary they are screwing takes up all their spare time." Jenny smirked.
"Such language." She heard as she pulled her shirt over her head.
"And woman claiming to be the worst mothers in the world because they work all week. So they leave the child with someone else to come and tell me how they have no time to try and connect with their children." Jenny had not heard him moving around the room and let out a surprised yelp as he wrapped his arms around her.
"So I guess this is you felling at first light again?" He whispered, Jenny could hear the genuine sadness in his voice.
"Ryan please…" Jenny started to say as she turned in his arms to face him.
"No this happens every time." He said releasing his hold on her and stepping back.
"Ryan don't do this, we had a good time, don't spoil it."
"Spoil it? I'm not spoiling anything." He said sitting on the edge of the bed.
"Oh and I am?" Jenny snapped.
"Yes you are because you're too scared to admit this is what you want. That it's good." Ryan said just as harshly.
"Good!" Jenny scoffed. "This isn't good it's convenient and you know it." Jenny began stuffing things back into her bag, refusing to let him get to her and trying to convince herself she was doing the right thing. Ryan grabbed her wrists and pulled her up. Her chest was pressed up against his and the thin material of her underwear and his was not nearly enough of a barrier between them. Ryan slid a hand up her shirt and the soft flesh of her stomach was practically humming as his palm moved across it. He stopped just short of her breast. "Well you must have thought it was good last night, what was it you said 'don't ever stop touching me'?" Ryan murmured into her ear. Jenny's breath was slightly laboured as she tried to reign herself back in.
"That was then, this is now." She said pushing him away.
"Don't give me that CRAP!" Ryan screamed. "For once in your life could you be honest with me. We've known each other for years and you still can't let us happen. Why?"
"You know why Ryan." She whispered.
"No, I don't actually. You won't tell me. All I know is that your ex husband was a bad guy. Well I'm not Jen. And I'm not one of those guys's who likes having a fuck buddy on call. So either we end this now, no more lunch dates, movies, drinks, sex, nothing, or you give us a chance." Jenny did not even noticed her hands clasped in his, pressed tightly to his chest, until he had stopped speaking.
"Ryan I…" Her voice cracked, she forced herself to keep her eyes focused on his.
"I'm going to have a shower. Make yourself a coffee if you want." She watched him through her slightly misty eyes as he walked to the bathroom, he turned and gave her a sad smile then shut the door.
She didn't make the coffee, she all but ran down to her car fighting back tears as she tossed her bag into the back seat.