Dinner that night was cooked by Zack, who is like, the Iron Chef reincarnated or something. We had about four courses, and he gave every one (expect for Baby, who is unstable) sparkling apple juice. I was mildly disappointed, because I like sparkling grape juice better, but Zack insisted on having everything his way, and threatened throwing the bottle at me if I complained one more time.

See? I mean, where's the fun in that? Trust me- my older brother knows how to ruin a perfectly good moment.

Of course, then Emily had to walk in and even ruin the moment MORE by snapping, "I hope those drinks aren't alcoholic, Zackary!"

Yup. Emily the party pooper.

"QUINNEH!" Baby tried to crawl out of his seat, reaching for my wine glass, tears dripping down his pudgy, dirty little face. "SPOON MAN SAYS BABY NEEEEEDDS SPARKLES!"

"DEEEREK! I WANT MOOOOORE!" Laura sobbed from the across the table.

"Please stop yelling, Laura," Emily said, looking annoyed. As usual, she was putting up the pretense of being the only good offspring.

"Shut up," Kaethan growled. He seemed to be in a bad mood, probably since he was 'accidentally' put next to Emily. Don't look at me! I have NO idea how it happened…. I bet it was Derek.

Um… yeees.

"Could I have the fish now?" Taeth wondered, yawning.

"No. You need to eat your salad. And the soup comes after the salad. THEN you get the fish," Zack said, being a butt-head. What a freak.

Oh well… Ha, ha…bubbles…

Suddenly, the doorbell rang, and the twelve of us looked up, surprised.

"I'LL GET IT!" Laura shrieked, jumping from her chair and dashing out of the kitchen, cackling madly.

"How fools rush in."

I gave Derek a strange look, and he glared back, flicking one of his mini-chubbeh tomatoes at me. Whaugh! I have been violated!

"I wonder who's at the door!" Dad said cheerfully, munching on his salad. "It's probably a solicitor."

"It probably is," Emily agreed, glaring at Kaethan, who sneered back.

Laura walked back into the kitchen, looking dazed. "Umm…" She said.

Now, 'Ummm…' is not a usual thing for Laura to say. Not like I cared. I was still pissed off about that tomato. Eugh. Stupid Derek.

"Good evening," a dude walked into our kitchen, looking like he had stepped out from some freakish B-Grade fantasy movie. He was dressed in shiny armor and his dark hair was long and pulled back in a ponytail. There was even a sword strapped to his back.


There was a very stunned silence, which was abruptly cut by Taeth, who jumped to his feet, knocking over his chair. "What the hell are YOU doing here?!" He spat. He looked even angrier than he usually looked around Jaan. I was impressed.

The man gave Taeth a cold smile. "What?" he drawled, stepping past Laura, who was blinking stupidly, "I can't even visit my own son?"

"OH MY GOD YOU'RE TAETH'S DAD!" I shouted, my mouth falling open.

"Shut UP Quinn!" Derek growled, kicking me from under the table.

"Get out of this house, Hataenth," Raen hissed, standing up as well, and glaring at the older elf. Raen looked kinda cool. I mean, if I wasn't too shocked to speak, I would've decided that he looked A LOT like Gandalf during that cool moment in Lord of the Rings where he's all "You shall not pass!" Only, without the big white beard and the sword, and the staff. I mean it. It was perfect.

I realized that I had missed something of what they were saying… apparently Whose-his-face wanted to kill off Raen, Taeth, and Kaethan right then and there.

And guess what?

My family had to ruin the whole climatic moment.

"ExCUSE me!" Emily stood up, and strode towards Taeth's Dad, prodding him with one of her accusing fingers. "You are going to get OUT of our house RIGHT now! Hear me?!"

He chuckled, and waved his hand, apparently placing some sort of spell on her. "My dumb little human, you're going to get no where in life ordering the higher race around."

Oh. So THIS was what it was all about? Did he think elves were superior or something?

I mean… they ARE… but that's completely beside the point…

"Stop it," Taeth growled, stepping forward. "Get out of here."

"Not until I'm King, Son," he said, smiling that really freaky, cold smile of his again.

Taeth's eyes narrowed even more, and I got that really creepy feeling that often comes when the magic from the Elfish Lands makes it here. I shivered despite myself, and was reminded of that one fateful chipmunk. Damn. That thing had been CLOSE to one of my arteries…

"SUNNSHIIIIIINE! SPOOOOOON MAN!" Baby leapt from his chair and shrieked with delight, jumping towards the elf. He must've been pysked that no one was stopping him from standing on the table.

Ahmm… Uh… BAD Baby… yeeeeeah.

Mr. Elf didn't seem to be certain what to do with Baby.

"DAMMIT!" Baby screeched, leaping onto the elf's back and pulling the long ponytail into his mouth. "NNNNR! HA HA HA! LOOKIT, QUINNEH! SPOON MAN! BUUUY SPOONS! SPOOOOOOONS!" Baby giggled hysterically, and placed his little hands over the elf's eyes. "GUESS ME! GUESS ME!"

"He wants you to guess him," I added helpfully.

Derek kicked me again.

However, it seemed like Baby had provided the appropriate distraction, which is something he can always be counted on to do.

With a whoosh and some cool colors, Raen had captured Mr. Elf, while Taeth picked Baby off his father's head.

I blinked, and realized that had been pretty fun. Cool.

"There will be his guards around the house. Taeth…? Jaan? Could you take care of them?" Raen wondered, reclaiming his princely look.

I was half tempted to bow, and say, "of course, your majesty," but I knew that Derek would just kick me again, and another bruise wasn't worth the trouble anyway.

"Yeah." Taeth ruffled Baby's hair, and handed him to Dad, who was still sitting down, munching on his salad. Leave it to Dad to not be freaked out by a random evil dude causing mayhem in our kitchen.

Jaan stood up and bowed slightly towards Raen, before making his way out of the kitchen. He paused, standing over What's-His-Face, and gave the older elf a disdainful look. "Idiot," he muttered, before completely exiting.

I blinked a few times. Why do all of the weirdest things happen to ME? I mean, I'm not a Weird Magnet!...or am I?

Hmm… Intruiging…

"QUINN!" Derek snapped his fingers in front of my face, annoyed.

"What?!" I growled back, glaring. Really. Derek should have some respect for his elders… or something.

"Quinn, stop daydreaming," Zack added, yawning. "You need to go get the soup off the stove."

I gave him a Look. Really. A freaky elf had just interrupted our dinner, Emily was still frozen in place, and he still wanted SOUP?

...I give up.

So, the next morning, it just HAD to be a Tuesday, probably just to spite me. Tuesday's are EVIL. First, you wake up knowing that absolutely NOTHING exciting will happen at school, and that you've still got FOUR more days to endure until the blessed weekend.


"Quinn Loren! Get up RIGHT NOW! The bus is coming in FIVE MINUTES!" Emily screamed, standing over me.

"GANNNNRA!" I screamed back. I was aiming for the sound of an angry bear who has just been awoken from it's slumbers, but Emily didn't seem to understand the danger that she was in.

"You've already missed too many days of school! You are NOT going to be tardy today!" She ordered, pulling my covers off me, letting the freezing cold air blast onto my unprotected arms and shins.


That wasn't me.

"SHUT UP LAURA!" Derek roared from somewhere downstairs.

"WOTCHER! DING! DING!" That was Baby.





This was getting old.

I rolled out of bed and miserably pushed past Emily, making my way towards the nearest bathroom.

The door, of course, was locked.

I blame it all on Tuesdays.


Zackary Loren is the creepiest smart person alive. He was singing in the shower. He was singing LOUDLY in the shower.

"SHUT UP!" I shouted, pounding on the door.


"Good morning, Quinn," Raen said, walking up behind me, obviously trying to escape the horror of my family downstairs.

I grunted at him, and glared. "Why'ou so happy?"

He smiled. "Today feels like it will be a perfectly normal day. After yesterday, I'm not sure I can handle another visitor."

I blinked and glared some more. Damn happy elf.

"SHUT UP IN THERE, ZACK!" I yelled instead, banging on the door some more. I'm not sure Zack heard me, as he moved on to singing "I Can Show You the World."

I turned around, and gave Raen another unhappy look, blaming him for the Curse of Tuesdays.

"Well, are you inviting anyone to attend the High School Dance with you?" Raen asked politely.

I gazed at him. "What?"

"Because I'm sure either Taeth or Jaan would love to go with you. They both seem very fond of you…" He paused, as if wondering how anyone could be 'fond' of me. Well, maybe he wasn't, but I was in a bad mood, so I decided that that WAS what he was thinking. Eugh. Mean Raen!

I eyed him.

He blinked back.

"WOOF! WOOF!" Along came our dogs, jumping up the stairs, and the fastest, Otis, pounced on me, while the other two took on Raen.

What was up with this? Was EVERYONE in this house hyper or something?!

Anyway, I was in danger of being licked to death, so I pushed Otis off me, and decided the beast had it in for me.

Thus commenced the most boring Tuesday of my life, starting from when I walked downstairs to find that Baby had stolen Laura's Barbies and had eaten most of their hair, and ending when a bunch of stupid middle school kids threw water balloons at our bus, so we all jumped out and chased them down.

I got home to find that Laura and Baby had started to dig a hole in the background, where they were trying to bury Zack's laptop, while Zack slept on the couch, oblivious to everything.

What a pain.

"Quinn! Quinn!" Taeth ran up behind me, grinning.

"Yes?" I asked, sighing. I think napping sounded like a LOVELY idea.

"Raen told me that there is going to be a ball at your school!" He said, grabbing my hand excitedly. "And I would LOVE it if you would accompany me!"

I blinked at him. Oooh. He was asking me to GO with him! Really! He could've just asked.

"Well?" He wondered.

"Uh… Ok." I said, surprised. A guy had NEVER asked me out EVER. One guy was about to once, but he was scared off after meeting my family. Ever since then, he always runs away when he sees me walking down the halls in school. What a pansy.

Taeth's face split into a grin, and he gripped my shoulders happily. "Really? You'll really go with me?"

"Um, yeah," I said.

And then I was COMPLETELY violated.

Taeth bent down and KISSED me.

…I should've been scandalized. Theoretically, I should've slapped him for dirtying my virgin lips.

Instead, I just stood there, shocked, and he ran off, leaving me dumbly standing in the hall way.


I felt like screaming and jumping around happily.

So I did.

Of course, then the telephone had to go and ring, so I picked it up, ignoring Ryan who was walking downstairs.

"Hello?" I'm sure I sounded absolutely delighted.

"Ahh! Quinn!"

…It was Mom.

"…Hello Mother…" I said, sighing and rolling my eyes. "How are you?"

She laughed. "Oh, I get by… Ha, ha. So, how is Raen doing?"

I shrugged, not caring that she couldn't see me. "Fine, I guess. I dunno. He's happier now that Taeth-"I giggled stupidly, "-and Jaan are here…"

"Jaan?" She asked abruptly. "JAAN'S there?!"


"Like, blonde, handsome, polite JAAN?!" She asked.

It was weird. She actually sounded kinda… worried.

"Yeah, he's the one. What are you getting so worked up about, anyway?" I asked, leaning against the wall, and rolling my eyes at Ryan, who blinked, and walked past me, on his way to the living room with a book.

"Doesn't Raen KNOW any better?!" She shrieked.

I paused.

She paused too. "Oh. Crappers. I forgot to tell him! QUINN! TELL RAEN!" She shouted.

"Tell Raen what?" I asked, rolling my eyes again. My mom was such a spaz.

"About Jaan, Quinn! Tell him it was Jaan and Janaelle who were behind the deaths-they've been plotting for a long time- I had to get him away from them before THEY tried to take the crown- because you know how Elf Land would be with THEM as the rulers… Get that elf OUT of our house!"

I paused.


"WHAT?!" I screamed.

"YOU HEARD ME!" She screamed back. "JAAN'S GOING TO KILL RAEN!"


A/N: Ah ha! Oooh! What a shocker! Well, yeah. One more chapter left! Hurrah! Well… I'm sad too, only it'll be fun to actually finish this thing, because when I started it, I had no plan whatsoever of EVER finishing it.


Yup. This is fun! Now, onto those of you who I love very much!

Celyn: I actually don't know if there will be a sequel or not… hmm… I'm not sure what it'd be about…

Venusvadore: Yup. It's very sad.

Sarah the Insane: Hmm… Intruiging. You know, I haven't had an Air Head in a REALLY long time… probably not since Halloween… Wow. I want candy now…

Rokhaya: You know, I wish I had a little brother like that too! Unfortunately all I have is a little sister who is a prep-in-training… ah well…

Liza Lew: What do you mean is confetti cake anything special? Haven't you ever had it before? Well, anyway. I'm not giving Jaan a chance, Lea! He's not a nice person! Pay attention!

Vulpes: Good. Yeah, I needed to include Raen's side of the story somewhere, so I did. Yup. Baby is silleh.

Yoz: That is kinda weird that Quinn speaks like your sister. I sorta speak like that too. Just as Sophie Lowe… she knows all about it… I'm so weird…

Sophie Lowe: Thank you for the grammar reminder! It has been changed right away! MWa ha ha ha! I can't wait to see if I can go to Olin too! Ooh! Ooooooh! freaks out I wanna meet Amy and see if she's a better roommate than Erin. Erin looked…suspicious… hmmm…. I need a sticker…

Fleeting Thoughts: Wow! Thank you! I love you so much! hugs

Blak pearl: Wow. Thank you SO much for the excellent review! I'm really glad that you like this story so much, and that it saved you from the creepy younger people. And, no, I don't come from a family of seven. I'm the middle kid in a family of three, sadly enough, but I'd love to have six other siblings. I actually based the Loren family off what I wanted my family to be like when I'm older… heehee.. Baby and all…Well, mostly I just used names I want for my kiddos, because I think Derek and…maybe Quinn are the only ones who are actually like me at all… Yuppers. Thanks again!