All witches are old and ugly,

All faeries so young and spry,

All princesses have hair of gold

And elves are fair and never die

All dwarves are stocky and bearded,

All swords are stuck in stones,

All frogs are enchanted

And giants crunch on human bones

All princes are tall and handsome,

All dragons breathe fire,

All magic spells are ancient

And a fox is surely a liar

All wizards are in robes

And unicorns are white as snow

With all these rules,

Where did "fantasy" go?

My sarcastic, tongue-in-cheek, commentary on the many unimaginative, dreadfully cliche fantasy novels that exist. I'd like to expand and add one or two more stanzas, but can't think of anything that fits the pattern I've got going and is the right mood/tone for the rest of it.