Title: Bruised & Broken

Author: DisasterousLetdown

Genre: Angst

Rating: R (For Violence)

Summary: Sometimes love hurts and it can leave you bruised and broken. (M/M)

Currently I'm sitting in my room thinking about the situation I am in... I am in a relationship with my best friend Derek Miller. We got together a few months ago after his boyfriend David Delson broke up with him. I really like Derek and feel like I'm in love with him, but I get the feeling that he's not over David yet. I feel like I'm the rebound guy and am not sure if this relationship is going to last. I should've known better than to start dating him after he and David broke up, but I wanted to date him so bad that I didn't think about it. I guess I didn't want to think about it, I'm kicking myself in the ass for my stupidity now. He's so distant with me, it wasn't like that in the beginning. I don't know what to think or feel anymore.

I slowly get off the bed and walk out of the room. I walk to the living room to see Derek staring blankly at the TV screen, it's not even turned on. I sit down next to him and gently touch him on the shoulder. He turns to me with a glare on his face and asks me what I want.

"Are you okay? You've been acting different lately, distant even."

"I'm fine Tim just leave me alone."

"This is about David, huh? You're still not over him."

All of a sudden I feel a stinging pain in my right cheek and I fall to the floor. He backhanded me, I can't believe Derek just hit me! What the hell was that about?

"Shut the hell up about things you don't understand, I had told you to leave me alone!" He screams at me.

"I was only trying to help you... I won't make that mistake again."

That must have really pissed him off cause the next thing I know he is on top of me punching me like there's no tomorrow. I push him off of me and slowly push myself to my feet. I turn to him with a glare on my face and he has a matching glare on his.

"Don't you ever touch me again." I say lowly, but forcefully.

"You shouldn't have pissed me off then." He says with a smirk.

I look at him in disgust. "I don't know what the fuck your problem is, but I've had enough!"

"Yeah and what are you gonna do... leave?"

"As a matter of fact yeah I am."

"Well then why are you standing there? Go!"

"Fine!" I say before I walk up to our room.

Moments later I come back down with all my things and walk over to the phone. I can feel Chester's eyes on me, but I just don't care. I quickly dial Mike's number and wait for him to answer.

"Mike?... Hey... I'm not so good... I've got a problem... I need a place to stay... Derek and I are having problems... No I don't really want to talk about it... Yeah could you?... Thanks man you don't know how much I appreciate this... Okay see ya in a little bit... Bye." I hang up the phone and turn around to see Derek standing a few feet away. (A/N: That was a one sided convo if you didn't realize that.)

"What are you doing?" He asks me.

"Leaving, just like we talked about."

"Yeah well you won't be able to stay away for long, you'll be back."

"No Derek I won't." I say seriously.

A frown forms on his face. "What?"

"You were beating me Derek and I don't care if it was a one time thing, no one hits me!"

"What? No Tim you can't leave!" He says starting to panic.

"I can and I am, Mike's on his way to pick me up."

"But we can work this out."

"If you've beaten me once there's a good chance you'll do it again, it doesn't only happen once! I'm not gonna stay and let it happen again, I'm not stupid Derek!"

"I know you're not stupid and I'm sorry for lashing out at you like I did it'll never happen again. Please don't leave Tim... I... I can't handle it without you... I... I love you."

"Do you?" I ask in a non believing tone.

His eyes widen. "Of course I love you, don't you believe me?"

"I don't know what to believe anymore." I say with a sigh.

"Please Tim just give us one more chance, don't give up yet."

I stare at him for a minute and then let out a sigh. "I'll go call Mike."

I walk over to the phone and dial Mike's number. I don't get an answer at his house so I call his cell phone.

"Hello?" He asks after he answers his phone.

"Hey Mike where are you?"

"About two or three blocks from my house."

"Okay well you can just turn around and go back home."

"Are you sure?" He asks in a worried tone.

"Yeah Derek and I worked things out so I'm gonna stay here."

"Well... alright man... if you're like sure."

"Sorry for making you get in your car for nothing."

"Don't worry about it, I'm here if you need me."

"Thanks Mike I'll talk to you later."

"Okay bye."

I hang up the phone and turn back toward Derek, he has a big smile on his face as he takes my hand and leads me upstairs. We walk into our room and lay down on the bed. He pulls me into his arms and holds me as we go to sleep. Myself I can't sleep right away cause I can't help, but wonder... will things really work out with Derek and is this the last time he will hurt me?

(Three Weeks Later)

I walk into the house after grocery shopping and put the bags down on the kitchen table. I'm in a good mood today so maybe Derek and I can go out for dinner tonight. Things have been going really well with Derek, he's back to his old self again. We talk for hours on end and I slept with him for the first time in months last week. It's nice that things are back to normal, I have my Derek back.

I put the radio on and sing along as I put the groceries away. I am almost done when I hear the door open and close. I know it is Derek so I tell him to come into the kitchen. He slowly walks in with a scowl on his face.

"What's wrong sweetie?" I ask in concern.

"Oh it's nothing I just saw two people I really didn't want to see and I've just been having a bad day." He says with a sigh.

"Oh man I'm sorry to hear that... why don't we go out to eat tonight and just spend some time together?" I suggest.

"Why is it that you automatically think that we should go out? I told you that I had a bad day so I might just want to stay home. Why do you always think that we should go out to eat?" He asks raising his voice with a glare on his face.

"I don't always think that we should go out to eat, it's just we hardly do it. You never want to go out with me!" I say raising my voice as well and walking out into the hall.

"Don't you take that tone with me!" He says following me.

"Why? That's how you talk to me!" I snap at him.

All of a sudden he grabs me and slams me against the wall. My head slams against the wall and he punches me in the face. I stare at him in shock then he throws me to the floor and kicks me in the stomach. He pulls me up by my hair and screams in my face, something about how I should be careful with what I say to him. I'm not exactly sure what he said cause my main focus is on the pain his hand is causing my head, he's gripping my head pretty tightly and pulling on my hair.

All of a sudden he kicks me in the face for not paying attention to him and then he throws me to the side causing me to hit my forehead on the table that is there. My vision gets slightly blurry, but I can make out his figure throwing things around. My vision focuses just in time to see a lamp being thrown in my direction. I move my body to the side slightly just as it crashes against the wall. I scream out in pain as pieces of glass cut into my shoulder and arm.

Derek stops what he is doing and stares at me with shocked wide eyes, but doesn't say a thing. I know that he is too stubborn to apologize for what he's done to me. I can tell by the look on his face that he knows what he did was wrong and he regrets it, but he doesn't say a word to me.

Slowly I stand myself up on my shaky legs and make my way down the hall. I can hear Derek following me, but I quickly go into the bathroom and lock the door behind me. He is on the other side of the door pleading for me to come out, but I ignore him. I look into the mirror and frown at my reflection. My lower lip is split and swollen, I have a cut above my right eyebrow that is bleeding worse than my lip and my left arm is nothing but blood. My whole body hurts and my heart is broken. I can't believe Derek beat me this bad. Tears start falling from my eyes and it grows into full on sobbing.

I sit down against the bathtub and pull my knees against my chest as I cry into my hands. I slowly pull my hands away from my face and look down at my bloodied arm. There is a couple of pieces of glass sticking out of my skin so I grit my teeth and pull them out. It hurts like hell, but somehow I manage to get every piece out of my arm. After that is done I lean against the tub and take a deep breath. I'll admit that I was scared to death of Derek, I still can't believe he hurt me so bad. I don't hear him in the hall so he probably went to bed, there's no way in hell I'm coming out of this bathroom though. Slowly I close my eyes to calm my nerves.

At some point or another I fell asleep and am now just waking up. I look around slightly disoriented and realize that I'm in the bathroom. I begin to wonder what time it is so I slowly exit the bathroom. I see that it is daytime to I go to the kitchen to see exactly what time it is. I'm surprised when I see that it's 10:45. I look out in the driveway and am relieved when I see that Derek's car is not there. That means he left so I don't have to deal with him.

I slowly walk up to our room and pull some clean clothes out of the dresser. I then walk into the bathroom and take off my clothes. It's a little difficult taking my shirt off with my hurt arm, but somehow I manage to get it off. I frown when I see a big bruise on my stomach and remember when he kicked me. I shake the thought from my mind as I turn the shower on and get in. I quickly wash myself off, but it takes a while to get the blood off of my arm. Once I'm done I turn off the shower and step out. My cuts don't look as bad as they did before so I quickly change into my clean clothes and leave the bathroom. I walk over to the phone and dial Mike's number.

"Hello?" He asks after it rings almost three times.

"Hey Mike."

"Tim, how you doing man?"

"Well I've been better."

"What's wrong?"

"I don't really feel like talking about it right now, but could you come pick me up?" I ask softly.

"Yeah sure no problem."

"I need a place to stay. I'll explain everything later, but can I come stay with you for a little while?"

"Sure I'm on my way."

"Thanks Mike." I say before I hang up the phone.

I quickly walk up to our room and take out two duffel bags and a backpack from the closet. I don't know where Derek went and I really don't care, I just want to get out of the house before he comes back.

I pull out all of my clothes from the dresser and closet then put them in the duffel bag. I put my shoes in the other duffel bag along with my CDs. I then put my laptop in my backpack with my song books and pens. Everything else I don't really care about, these are the main things I don't want to let go of.

Once I'm done I hear a knock on the door. I walk to the front door and open it to see Mike standing there. Once he sees me his eyes widen in shock, I can't blame him I must be a sight.

"What happened to you?" He asks as he enters the house.

"Well... Derek was really angry and... things kind of got out of control."

"Derek did this to you?!" He asks in surprise.

I nod my head and look down at the floor.

"Has he ever done anything like this before?"

"One time before, but nothing like this. I... I just can't deal with it so I need to get out."

"Where is Derek?"

"Don't know and don't care."

"Okay like do you have your things ready?"

"Yeah it's all upstairs."

He nods his head and then follows me upstairs. We grab my things then take them out to his car. I look around to make sure I have everything and then we walk out of the house. I don't really want to leave, but I know that if I don't leave now I may never.

What seems like only minutes later we arrive at his house. I leave all my stuff in his back seat cause I don't feel like taking it in at the moment and I follow him into the house. He goes into the kitchen to get us something to drink while I sit down at the table. I sit there with my elbows on the table and my head in my hands. Right now I feel like I'm walking around in a daze and that everything that is happening isn't real.

"So you care to explain what exactly he did?" Mike asks as he sits down across from me.

"What is there to say... he was angry and I was the one he took it out on." I say with a sigh.

"So he beat you and you called me to get away."

"Yeah basically."

"When did this happen? This morning?"

"No actually it was last night... I slept in the bathroom."

"Damn I'm glad you called me... oh my God... that night like a few weeks ago... did he beat you too then?" He asks with a horrified expression on his face.

I slowly nod my head. "That was the first time he ever hit me, but he had apologized and promised that it would never happen again so I gave him another chance... this time was much worse than that time though."

"I don't think I wanna know what happened, but tell me anyway."

"Okay I don't know how it happened, I think he pushed me over or something and I hit my forehead on the table in the hall. I hit it so hard my vision was blurry! Anyways he was yelling and screaming, at some point or another he grabbed the lamp and threw it at me. I moved of course which made it hit the wall, but I did end up with shards of glass in my arm."

"That explains why you're not moving it much."

"Yeah. I feel bad for leaving him cause he really did look shocked by what he did, but I just couldn't stay."

"Well that's understandable, I would leave too. Look you're welcome to stay as long as you like."

"Thanks Mike I really appreciate it." I say with a grateful smile.

"Well you're my best friend so I'm happy to help out."

All of a sudden we hear a knock on the front door and we stare at each other in question. Mike stands up to answer the door and I follow along behind. I just hope it isn't who I think it is.

Mike opens the door to reveal Derek. He sees me and immediately asks me to come home.

"You have some nerve showing up here!" Mike says through gritted teeth.

"Excuse me?" Derek asks in surprise and confusion.

"Tim told me about how you've been treating him, how dare you lay a finger on him! How could you do that to him? You know what just get the hell out of here!"

"But that's what I came here to tell him... I enlisted myself for anger management, I'm getting help."

"Really?" I ask softly.

"Yeah you mean so much to me Tim, I don't want to lose you and I know that I need help so that's what I'm doing. Please don't leave me, we can make this work."

I stare at him hesitantly and Mike looks at me in shock for even considering it.

"Don't fall for it Tim, you need to move on without him. You don't want to get hurt again, do you?"

"I love him Mike." I say softly. "And like he said he's getting help, maybe I can help him if I stay. I didn't really want to leave anyway."

"Please don't do this Tim." Mike pleads with me, he looks scared.

"Don't worry about me Mike I'll be fine, thanks for helping me out though. We should go get coffee tomorrow."

"Well... alright." He says softly, I can tell he doesn't want me to go.

"Don't worry okay, I'll see you tomorrow." I say as I grab Derek's hand and walk out of Mike's house.

I walk over to Mike's car and take out my stuff while Derek walks over to his car. I take my stuff over to his car and put it in the back seat. Once I'm done I get in the passenger seat and Derek starts the engine. I'll admit it feels good to be going home, I really didn't want to leave. I know that Derek crossed the line when he beat the hell out of me, but somehow I didn't want to leave him. I know that makes me a very stupid and foolish person.

I glance over at Derek, but he's staring intently at the road. In fact he won't even look at me, I think he feels weird now after everything that's happened. I definitely feel uncomfortable now, I turn my head toward the window and watch the passing scenery. It doesn't help me feel anymore comfortable so I turn on the radio to see if I can keep my mind off the tension in the car. Avril Lavigne's song 'My Happy Ending' is playing and it actually makes me slightly depressed cause it makes me think... will this relationship last?

We arrive at home and we get out of the car. Once again I leave my stuff in the backseat for the time being and walk up to the house. I walk in and Chester slams the door behind us. I turn around quickly and come face to face with a very angry Derek. I take a step back in fear, now I'm wishing I would've stayed at Mike's.

"Why the hell did you do that Tim?" He asks in a low voice.

"D... D... Do what?" I stutter.

"Tell Mike about everything!" He screams.

I stumble back away from him. "I'm sorry Derek."

"No, but you will be." He says punching me in the face three times.

I fall to the floor and scream in pain when he grabs my bad arm and lifts me up. "Please Derek... my arm... it still hurts."

His grip actually loosens and he has a concerned look on his face. The look vanishes and is replaced with a menacing glare. He grabs my arm and slams me up against the wall.

"You need to learn to keep your mouth shut, you just don't tell people what happens in the privacy of our own home." He growls.

"Please Derek, don't do this." I plead, but it falls on deaf ears as he slams my head against the wall forcefully.

I fall to the floor and he starts kicking me repeatedly in my chest. By the time he stops I'm coughing profusely and even cough up a little blood. I stare at the thick crimson liquid and turn my shocked eyes to Derek. He just shrugs and punches me in the face. I roughly push him away from me and he slams into the opposite wall. I take the chance and try to stand, but I can't seem to do it so I crawl my way down the hall. Derek walks over to the closet by the front door and pulls out a baseball bat. My eyes widen in fear when he starts walking toward me.

I frantically move my body toward the bathroom, but since he's walking he has the advantage. The look in his eyes frightens me, he's beyond pissed off at this point. He tightens his grip on the bat when he reaches me and swings it down upon my head. I fall the little ways I have to the floor in blinding pain and just lay there. Slowly my eyes close and oddly enough I don't even try to open them again. I can feel blood pouring out of my head and I'm starting to feel weak. I know that I shouldn't, but I'm basically giving up. I don't see the point anymore, I'm ready to end this pain. I can actually feel myself dying and surprisingly enough I'm not scared. It is a weird feeling though. The only regret I have is the fact that I'm not going to make it to Starbucks tomorrow to have coffee with Mike, he didn't want me to go back with Derek in the first place so I hope this doesn't hurt him too much. God I'm going to miss him and Derek both... when I say Derek I mean the old Derek, not the one he's become. I miss my best friend and am saddened by what he's become. I wonder if the old Derek is even in there still, hmm... I guess I'll never know. I won't hold this against him though, he's still my Derek and I love him very much.

Soon after I relax in the position I'm in I slowly fade away and I welcome the darkness with open arms.

(Derek's POV)

I stop screaming and yelling when I notice that Tim's not moving. I stare at him for a moment before hesitantly getting down on my knees and moving closer to him. His head is bleeding and shows no signs of stopping anytime soon, I also notice how he's not breathing. I put my hand against his neck for a few seconds then quickly back away in fear and shock when I don't feel his pulse.

I lean against the wall and can't take my eyes off of Tim. He's starting to look pale and it's killing me to look at him, but I can't force myself to move. It's like I've become numb and it feels like time is barely ticking away. It feels like the end of the world's in front of me and I just sit here in shock. Tim's dead and I'm going to jail. In reality I could only wish that it was the end of the world.

I can't believe it went so far, it was like after he pushed me all I could see was red and I had no control over my actions. I can't believe I did that to Tim, my best friend and lover.

Slowly I stand up on shaky legs and walk toward the phone. I have to call the police, there's no getting out of this. I look at Tim once again and have to look away, but the image will haunt me for the rest of my life. I shakily pick up the phone and dial the number I never thought I'd have to dial considering the circumstances.

"911 what is your emergency?" The operator asks.

"I... oh my God... I just killed my boyfriend." I say softly before I burst into tears.

A/N: Well what did you think? Loved it? Hated it? Please let me know cause I'm really curious to know what everyone thinks of it. Myself I'm proud of it and usually I never like my stories so that says a lot for me :o) I really would appreciate a review though. Hope you enjoyed it!