I've cramped up my insides,
a temporal change of thinking,
the creaking of silent tears,
i wish it not to be.

i am void of emotion,
personal experience overcame Hurt,
tucking it somewhere,

Lost.

a state of denial,
I feared no fear,
saving my imperfections, so perfect
the lack of reality.

i wanted sleep to escape,
yet danger awaits
awake to discover,
'i am still here'

i hate dreams,
derived from memory,
from fantasies,
i wish it not found.

lie to myself,
the fakeness of me
grin the grins of cheerleaders
on the battlefield, who

cheat loneliness.

so,
create the fool
of puppets and masters.

who dance merrily,
as
they'll pull on my strings, and i'll smile

the perfect façade.