WHERE THE HELL ARE MY GLASSES?!

I hyperventilated. I screamed. I cried. I ranted at what could have been a car or a didjeridoo, who knows. But one thing was certain. That no good, lousy 'Hades' had stolen my glasses! The fiend!

Oh, they were on my head. Nevermind.

Donning my newly found glasses, I looked around. I was in a stonewalled room, small and decorated with an interesting flair reminiscent of the Renaissance perio-oh, neat! Vegetables!

"Yay!" escaped my lips, and echoed everywhere-until a disturbingly familiar and very sexy voice muttered, "Shut it, Echo."

Echo shut it, and left the room quietly.

I spun around, searching for the source of this disturbingly familiar and very sexy voice, and discovered that spinning around was a very fun thing to do, and would have continued it, if not for the disturbingly familiar and very sexy hands that kept me from doing so.

I looked up.

And squeaked.

He grinned.

Behind him was an thin, aging woman who reminded me all too much of someone I had never met or known existed but probably wouldn't like. I growled at her, and she blinked.

"What a temper, isn't it sweet?" purred that disturbingly familiar and very sexy voice.

The old cow rolled her eyes. "You're willing to pick anything opposite of Persephone, aren't you? Plain as it might be?"

Who was she calling plain, bitch?

Oops. I said that out loud, didn't I?

Heh.

"The ugly cowbitch slowly walked around the very sexy man and looked like she was going to kill me, and using my magic ninja powers to cut her body in-I'm narrating myself, aren't I?" Cowbitch's eyes were popping out of her skull, and her nails must have too, because they hurt while they were digging themselves into my neck.

Blurriness, and lightheadedness.

My dream man wavers in and out of the dark and bluriness. He grins, then says, "Enough, Hera. Remember all the other gods she'll piss off."

Oh, sweet oxygen. I collapsed, probably looking like a fish out of water, puckering for air-or is it water? I really don't get what the heck is up with fish these days-with my eyes popping out, and drifted off into dreams of gods.