All my life I've questioned my own ability

I am so capable of seeing faults in others, but I automatically assume that my imperfections outweigh the good that I am capable of accomplishing

Rule number 1 is never to compare

Looking into his clear brown eyes I find it hard not to have thoughts of my failure cloud my vision

Under my sudden boost of confidence lay the remaining bits and pieces of my past

I've been through so much

I know i've come far

Farther than most are capable of

I've lasted so strong

I changed who I was

I promise

Never live your life for someone

That's what they always tell me

You will only end up hurting

It's so hard when you have so little to live for

You cling onto the next best thing

And hope to God that you never let go

I have before

Let go

Given up

Some of the best and worst times of my life were when I was alone

Looking for a hand to hold

Lost

You say I don't act my age

Maybe it is because I lost my childhood

It's tainted with memories I've tried so hard to forget

Of a girl whom I was inseperable with

I fell into the trap of popularity

The image of perfection

I learned so much

All the tricks of the trade

And then she let go

Left me behind

She's gone

It's comical how she expected me to take her back into my life

For once- I was the strong one in the relationship

The better one in a time of doubt

She knew that I knew what to do

I know how to comfort

She came crawling back

Asking for help

The image of her on her knees

Begging me for help

Scars me from within

She was so weak

It ripped open wounds from long ago

But I refused to let emotion play a part in my life ever again

I pierced myself shut

My empathy had long since dissapated

My love was gnarled

So here I lay

Internally wounded

Eternally scarred