Sometimes, I'll be walking along, looking at music, preparing for an audition, and all of the sudden I walk straight into a wall.

It isn't an ordinary wall. It's a huge, gray, ugly wall with a large talking mirror on it, like in Snow white. Except it doesn't tell me I'm beautiful. The mirror will talk to me. It always says the same thing.

"What were you thinking? You are no where good enough for this. They'll never let you in."

Sometimes, the reasons differ, but the idea is always the same.

"Can't you do anything right?"

When I run into this wall, I try to ignore it and walk around it, but it seems to go on forever. Climbing over it is unthinkable, so I will try to break through. I ram myself against it hard.

"You won't get through," it says, "You can't do it, just like you can't do the audition or anything. You are just useless!"

But I keep on slamming myself against it, tears streaming down my face. Sometimes this will go on for just a few minutes. Other times, it'll go an hour and my mother will be nearby, encouraging me.

And that mirror keeps on taunting me.

So then, I will stand back from the wall, and try to cheer myself up by singing, hoping that it will cause the wall to disappear and my confidence rises.

But the tears running down my face run down my throat as well, choking me, causing ugly and fearful sounds to come out instead of music. And the harder I try to sing, the more I cry and choke, and the wall grows bigger and meaner.

"You see," the mirror says. "You cannot do it. You have no talent. There is no reason why you should think that you do. Stop kidding yourself and wake up. Or better yet give up! And never audition for another show again!"

And then there is silence, only broken by sobs.

Eventually, the clock strikes the hour. Its meticulous face frowns when I don't respond and it says, "Time for the audition."

A newly formed door in the taunting wall opens and lets me through. The dull and tired face on the door says, "Good luck," but it says this to everyone who walks through it, and there are thousands. He never means it but he always says it. And somehow it is supposed to help.

The door lets me walk through the wall, but even when I'm on the other side, I can still see its mocking face in my mind and hear it taunting me.

"You took the easy way through, but I'm still here. And I will always here. If you weren't so stupid and incompetent, you would've made me disappear. But did you? No. And you'll never make me disappear because you won't be able to. It's just that simple. I will never leave you."

I can only hope that next time, the wall will have disappeared, and I will walk through, untouched.