Grunge suddenly pops into the frame: "Oh yes, enjoy your cuddling now boys, cuz later…neheheheheh…." He grins semi-evilly... yes, tis the third chapter, loves. Enjoy


!#$&Later, at 5:45 AM&$#!

DING, DONG!

"Mmph…" Alexei rolled back over into Myōko's hair, attempting to subconsciously deafen the noise with it, but instead he just ended up cuddling and falling back asleep…

DIIING, DONG!

Myōko was awake now; he moved to go answer the door, sitting up and rubbing his eyes, but when he actually tried to get out of bed, he found there were a pair of white, smoothed skinned arms restraining him.

"Mmph…nooooo…" Alexei said sleepily. "Stay in bed…"

"But baby…the door…"

"Nooo…"

DIIIIIIIING, DONG!

"See?"

"Hmph…well, if you have to go…tell 'em to fuck off and come right back to bed."

"Of course," Myo kissed the top of Alexei's head and he reluctantly let him go, rolling over and muttering vaguely about pricks who woke people up at 9 AM and thus caused his Myōko to get out of bed when he should stay, roll over and go back to sleep…However, his rant was cut short by Myōko's voice, yelling,

"Hey, what the hell?! Get out of my apartment! Wait—Oh, HOLY HELL! But—! BUT WE DIDN'T DO IT LAST NIGHT!"

"…as if it couldn't get any worse," Alexei muttered cynically. He didn't even move, though he knew impending doom was less than five minutes outside the bedroom door…

"Alexei! Hide, that bitch sent the damn missionaries again—the crazy ones!" Myōko yelled; there were scuffling noises and sounds of a struggle. Then, just as the five minutes were up, the so-called missionaries burst through the bedroom door, dragging Myōko in with them, bound to a chair. Alexei hadn't even gotten out of bed yet, much less put on any clothes…all he'd done was sit up and slip his hand under his pillow and…oh, thought Myo, as the missionaries burst in, crucifixes at the ready.

"Surrender, convert and repent, sinners!" Said a strident, androgynous nun at their front, cross held in outstretched arm in front of her.

"Sinners?" Alexei asked innocently, looking around. He turned to Myōko. "I don't see any sinners here, do you Myōko?"

"Er…"

"Nope, no sinners here, you must have the wrong apartment; now, kindly, fuck off."

"Bah, foolish mortal! Your arrogant sarcasm will get you no where with us!"

"Well, good, cuz I don't wanna go anywhere with you guys."

"…Bah! It's so obvious that the both of you are shameless, sinful, deviants! I could smell it when I walked in the door!"

"Thanks, I guess we do have a pretty kickass sex life." Alexei shrugged as though flattered, smirking.

"Damn, you mean we still haven't managed to get that out of the couch?" Myo joined in, winking at Alexei.

"You admit it even!"

"Why wouldn't I? You're just jealous because you obviously don't get any; here's an idea: get the hell out of our apartment, ditch the habit, and maybe you might have a chance."

"Your impertinence grows old, mortal!" She waved the cross threateningly and stepped toward the bed, suddenly producing a katana and placing it to Myōko's neck; her cohorts behind her did the same. Alexei took on a sharp and definitely pissed off expression.

"Repent, or I send your lover to hell, foolish mortals!"

"Mortal? …What, you think you're invincible with that little cross of yours? Sorry, but I don't think we're the only ones who're mortal here." Alexei pulled his beloved Beretta from under his pillow and nonchalantly pointed it at the nun's head.

"And I promise you…you'll be in hell before he ever is." Alexei cocked the automatic. The nuns' entourage had stood strong until now…but now some of them were looking like they knew they'd finally knocked on the door of the Psycho-Sonuva-Bitch that definitely would not have any qualms about personally putting a bullet in each one of their heads.

"So…whoever's willing to take a bullet for God…just keep standing where you are." Alexei said in a low, crazy voice. All of the missionaries save for the leader fled at once. Alexei sat up a little more.

"I'd put that butter knife away and run, if I were you." He glared.

The nun seemed to be considering for a moment but then—the katana was suddenly away from Myouko's neck and swinging towards Alexei's—

Bang!

The katana went flying—and lodged itself in the closet door. The katana had been shot out of the nun's hand by Alexei's trusty Berretta 9 mm. The nun looked at him with a look of pure horror, before dropping her crucifix and bolting out of the apartment.

"Tch," Said Alexei, annoyed, as he slid out of bed with a sheet around his waist. His first action was to untie Myōko, who cupped his face and kissed him on the cheek gratefully – "That was close, arigatou gozaimasu, koi." "No problem." – and his second action was to pick up the crucifix from the floor and look at it with a pointedly annoyed and quietly disgusted manner.

"Ph." He went to the bedroom's only window and opened it and, giving the thing in his hand a last, fare-not-well glare, threw it out the window with all the force he could manage at this time in the morning.

A cat screamed in surprised pain as it fell off a fence across the street; Myōko winced. Alexei turned to him.

"Let's go back to bed." He said semi-sleepily, grabbing Myō's hand and pulling him toward the bed. Myōko didn't protest as he laid down next to Alexei, who threw the sheets back over them, wrapped his arms around Myō and made a pillow out of his chest. He didn't mind though, putting his arms around Alexei's lithe frame and rubbing his back with one hand.

"Mmm…" One of Alexei's hands crept up into Myōko's hair to run it through his fingers and generally play with it. After Alexei had closed his eyes, Myō placed a hand on the back of Alexei's head, petting his hair a little. He couldn't tell, but he thought Alexei had fallen back asleep, which was very probable. His lover responded to the touch by nestling deeper into his chest. "Myōko…" he murmured. Myō kissed his forehead and stroked his hair again, settling a little and going to sleep himself. And there they slept relatively peacefully until they once more woke up and went out into the world beyond their bedroom so as to eat, get themselves into trouble, shoot things, and generally be themselves.

The End.


Aw. Fluffy. Anyway..."arigatou gozaimasu, koi" means, basically, "thanks a hell of a lot, love." XD My only regret about this story is that while we saw Alexei's awesome sharp-shooting skillz, we didn't get to see Myouko kick any bad guy ass with his funktastic Kung-Fu. Until I write again, folks!