he is born
with a final scream
and a first cry
there was no happiness
he was to blame
for his mother's death
his father hated him
even though
he was still too young
to know what he had done

he is a child
for two years
and then
an adult
on the first day
the man he knows
only as 'daddy'
held his small head
under the water
for so long
too long
he is no longer a child

he is alone
with the knife in the dark
it is all his fault
all his fault
his mother long ago
his father's heart attack
his girlfriend
still warm in her grave
he was born
he faught back
he drove the car
and now he holds the knife
he had caused
so much pain
he feels he needs to
end it in himself
here and now
he is gone