15Chapter 1: Blast from the Past
Sitting in my room, remembering. I'm on my bed, surrounded by darkness, suffocated in the silence. It was exactly a year ago, today. It happened. So I'm thinking back. Back to all those times. Times we had fun, as a family. Times long gone. Times that will never come back. Times that won't return. Times I can't feel again.
::FLASHBACK::
"Daddy! Where's Mommy? How come she didn't come home again Daddy?" A girl called out, while bounding down the stairs to greet her exhausted father as he entered the house with bagfuls of groceries.
"Cheesepop, I told you, Mommy's not coming home. Darling, you ask for her everyday, but Mommy went far away last month sweetie, and she can't come back." The girl burst into tears. It pained his heart to see her like this – his only child weighed down with the misery of loss.
"But Daddy," the girl wailed, tears now streaming down her cheeks, flowing freely down her face, "You promised that she would come back today. You said that I could see her, and she would come home today! I want to see Mommy!" She sobbed quietly, hiccoughing as each pearl droplet fell from her eyes.
He didn't know what to say. "Cheesecake, Mommy, Mommy w…wo…," he stuttered, shaking to get the words out, "Mommy won't be coming back." He saw her face drop. Her tears fell unceasingly, an endless waterfall of misery, pain, and sorrow.
"Daddy, where is Mommy now?"
He bowed his head. The memories of their happiness together as a family came back to him. Overtaking his mind, and flooding it with pictures from the past that were long-since forgotten. He shut it out. Remembering was too painful. "Sweetcheese, let me take you outside."
He opened the door for his little girl, and stepped out into the back yard. It was dark and cold out – a small breeze blew, sending chills up his spine – or was that the memory of the happiness that once was?
Bright stars lit up the dark sky, and the moon flooded the yard with more light than the street lamp out front. The stars shimmered, sparkling, glowing. It was time for him to tell her, to make himself say what he had managed to put off for long enough.
He picked up his little girl, and sat her on his shoulders. "Sweetie, look up," he said. Slowly, his daughter lifted her head, and saw the moon staring back at her, stars glistening in its wake.
"See all those stars up there? Your Mommy is one of those stars. She's up there. It's where all good people go when they leave Earth sweetie. It's a place called heaven." He choked the words out before his tears came rolling down his cheeks, a lump was stuck in his throat – his heart.
"But Daddy," she asked again, "Why didn't Mommy tell us that she had to go? Why did she leave us all alone?"
How could he answer that? How could he tell his little girl the answer to her question, when he knew it would hurt her so much? How could he even use the 'd' word in front of her? He hadn't admitted it to himself, so how could he tell his own kid that her mother was gone forever?
"Cheesepop, when people get called into the sky, to be with the stars, God calls them up. They have to go and answer Him. They can't not go sweetie. So when Mommy got called to go up, she went to that place. She couldn't tell us she was going. There wasn't enough time."
"Will Mommy ever come back, Daddy?"
What could he say? How could he explain? She was just a kid, she wasn't even old enough to know about death, let alone have her mother leave her at such a tender age. He didn't want to say it, to tell her, but he knew that it was his duty as her father, and if he didn't, then who would?
"People who get called to go up to heaven can never come back. Heaven is where all the good people go, sweetcheese. When God calls us to heaven, we can go and be with Mommy, and see her there, okay?"
"Okay."
He brought her down from his shoulders and embraced her tightly, never wanting to let go. He'd lost one of the two most important women in his life. He didn't want to lose the other – not now, not ever.
They sat together on the bench in the back yard, him singing softly to his child, while she fell asleep. Looking up at the stars, he thought of her, the pain and anguish tearing at his heart. His fresh wounds had been torn open and salted with the power of memory.
He buried his head in her golden hair and breathed in the scent of her shampoo. Going back inside, he thought of all those times they had gone to the cinema as a family, or played on the swings at the park, or visited the amusement park. Memories overpowered him, as he sat down on the couch, and hugged to the sleeping form of his daughter, the tears welled up once more. This time they wouldn't stop. He couldn't stop them. He had no-one to be brave in front of anymore, he could just let go.
The tears came again, and all that night, they didn't stop.
::END OF FLASHBACK::
The tears came again, and all that night, they didn't stop.
Hey Everyone!
This is my first story on Fictionpress. If anyone has any comments or constructive criticisms, please don't hesitate to email… and please REVIEW!
Yeah, it would be really great if you gave me your opinion on whether or not this story should be going anywhere… y'know? I need peoples' opinions to see if this is worth continuing. The plot? The past? The style of writing? Gimme a buzz and let me know what you think.
Thanks…
Juvi