Home

Another day is over. Another day in hell, also known as, school. Except school isn't really that bad. At school I get to see 'him' most of the time. Between classes, at lunch, before and after school. No 'he' is not one of those childish crushes I'll forget about in a week. I'm talking about my boyfriend.

Class is being dismissed. I walk out into the hall and he meets me. He takes my hand in his as we walk down to his locker. We arrive and I take my bag off my shoulder and throw my jacket on. It's winter and it's cold. I pick my bag back up and we turn to walk from the school. He takes my hand again. We arrive outside and we stand for a few minutes, until he has to go to catch his bus. His arms are around my waist, mine around his neck. My head rests on his chest.

The time comes and we say our goodbyes and go our separate ways. I start my long walk by myself. It doesn't seem all that long sometimes. Sometimes I get so wrapped up in my own thoughts I don't pay attention to where I'm going. It's a good thing I know the way with my eyes closed. The whole walk I think about him. I think about the way he holds me, the way he always seems to be looking at me, the way he tries to help me in any way possible, and the way he's always making contact with me in some way, like he's making sure I'm still there. I think about everything that happened that day, who we talked to, what I did to embarrass myself and make him laugh and question me. Sometimes I think about what it is about me that makes him stay.

My thoughts are suddenly interrupted by the realization that I'm home and need to get in the house still. I get in, take my boots off, hang my jacket up, grab my bag, and run up the stairs. I sit in my chair and turn to the computer screen.

Suddenly, it hits. It happens everyday shortly after arriving at home. I have instantly become alone. There's no one around besides my dog, who's sleeping, and my sister who is too engrossed in the TV to notice anything. The thing I notice the most if the absence of 'him.' I can't feel his touch, I can't hear his voice, I can't look in his eyes. I can't rest my head on his chest and hear his breathing and feel his heart beat. I can't reach over and feel his hand. I know it only lasts until the following morning before school but the feeling of loss is so strong I almost want to cry. It temporarily feels like I'll never see him again. I can't even bring myself to think about that.

Baby,

Now that I've found you,

I won't let you go.

I've built my world around you,

I need you so.

I know tomorrow it will all start again. I know in a few hours he'll be online and we can talk. I know when I go to sleep he will be in my dreams.

Until then I feel empty. For this reason school is nowhere near as bad as home. School has become my escape from reality. School is where I can be with 'him' and away from my family. I love them, I do, but sometimes they can be irritating. At school they don't exist, he does. I wish I didn't have to go home at the end of the day.

I Love You.

A/N Song: Now that I've Found you – Alison Kraus