Idealistic faith, misplaced, disregarded, thrown away. 6-09-2005

Upon these knees (these broken knees),
youthful lips move to pray.
Heartfelt words sent to a god she no longer trusts,
a god she despises.

Hands clasped, fingers intertwined,
tighter and tighter she grips,
circulation cut off.
She prays to god to help her,
help her still believe.
All she asks for is her faith back,
idealistic faith she never thought could be taken away.
Just to be naive again.
She prays to be ignorant.

When god doesn't answer her back,
she isn't disappointed.
He never did before either.
She can't help the frustrated tears that glide down her cheeks.
She prays to believe again. Prays to have youthful faith.

For all she sees in God anymore,
is

vengeance,
arrogance,
and no regard for humanity.

Still believing in his existence,
still believing in the bible.
a bible she knew well
She could only interpret him as they portrayed him:
fire and brimstone.

Her worship could not be given to a god that didn't symbolize
love