This is heartbreak and we're so addicted
to the taste of cyanide and (blood red) wine
bleeding sweat as I tremble against you
because the heat of your murderous desire against my neck
is intolerable, irrefutable
we never held onto anything because we were all about second chances
driving in fast cars and laughing death in the face just to pass the time
inhaling solid smoky sex and wearing crimson stained silver around our wrists
we park the car and lick the gasoline off the asphalt
and it burns up our oxygen in violent flames of black defeat
so now we're burning in the fire
that I fed with my whispers of fairytale romances and giddy schoolgirl crushes
and you press your lips against mine frantically again
the bittersweet taste always feels as good as another sharp needle fix
I don't want to love you
so I pretend and just keep on giving
because you always ask so nicely
You're so beautiful
but your craving is just too sharp and my flesh tears too fucking easily
and the only way to appease the guilt eating at my insides
is to slide slide slide another knife along my thigh
(fate brought us here)
I'm tired of feeling the poison from your memory burn through my bloodstream
like vertigo every time I close my eyes to dream
my wrists are screaming to bleed themselves empty
just so I can fucking cry
because I don't want to love you anymore
I forgot to exhale
I'm just holding my breath as I stand here waiting for you
this is heartbreak, isn't it beautiful?

---

I always thought that love was more beautiful than this. I didn't think it would require me to bleed so much. I can't let my wounds heal because everytime I put everything back together again.. he does something that tears me apart again. I thought that love was all I ever needed to be happy .. I guess I was wrong. I'm wrong aboutmost things nowadays .. I'm just so fucking naive. He keeps on hurting me, and I just continue on giving him my heart to break some more.