There is a tiny hole
A missing miniscule grain
In the cement between two of the tiles
And I wonder, sitting there on that cool, porcelain countertop
If I whisper…
No, a whisper would be like an earthquake for such a tiny crack
If I just wonder, slowly…
One thought creeping up like a silky spider behind another…
If I could let my dreams and hopes trickle down into this little groove.
If I could bury these ambitions
I would offer up my fears and my angers
But they're so large
They would never spiral down so smoothly
Into this insignificant pocket
This little flaw in the white tile.
I allow my toe to trace over the creases
The edge of the tile seems to shudder as I stroke it
I remember when I could feel like that
I recall when I would yearn and dream for that
For the slightest brush of another human
Nothing of promises or obligations
Merely a brief snapshot of someone caring
An apocalyptic moment of serenity before it all comes crashing down
But it is in some sort of chronological mapping
A space labeled so freely on a murky timeline
Void of any true meaning
Any true intention.