Neon blue fishnet stockings.
Black mini jean skirt.
Grey long sleeve tee-shirt, topped with a black camisole.
Chains draped around her waist and wrists.
Nails painted black with the moons painted white.
Spiked dog collar.
Long dyed black hair with the tips dyed neon green.
She was so scary.
And so hot.
Everything about her was, even her name; Saoirse.
Every guy in school drooled over her, every heterosexual guy with any taste, that is.
I certainly drooled over her. I used to know her. Well, she used to know me pretty well. We used to be friends. Well, she used to be my friend. We used to be close. Well, I wanted to be close to her.
I met her when I moved to Stratton last year, I knew no one here except for my cousin; Justin. I didn't know him very well, at the time; I still thought he was living with his parents, turned out he'd been living on his own for a few years. My parents told me to hang out with him anyways; they said it would better than being alone. They had no idea what they were talking about.
I never got to know Justin very well, even if I hung out with him and his group, I only hung around with them for about 5 months. At first, I thought they were just a typical gang of teenagers, causing occasional trouble, smoking, but that was it.
Man was I wrong.
They all had criminal records, except Saoirse, either she was just stealthier than the boys, or she just hung out with them when things were calm. Justin's criminal record was longer than most books I'd read, Jerry had just come out of juvy and Nick had also been kicked out of the house at fifteen. They were, for lack of a better word; a gang. They were all high school drop outs and only Saoirse and Nick had real jobs; Justin and Jerry stuck with the drug dealing to pay the bills. They all carried guns and it wasn't unusual for one of them to turn up at the base (the empty warehouse at the train yard), cut up or with a bullet embedded somewhere in their body. I was welcomed in the group because I'd taken first aid courses, and knew how to stitch people up and cut out a bullet. That way they didn't have to go to the hospital, and attracted far less attention.
At first, I liked the idea of being in "the group", as they called it. I liked being around my cousin and Saoirse, even if neither of them ever showed any interest in me. Justin couldn't care less about me, except for when he had turned up at my house at midnight one night with a bullet in his leg that he wanted no questions asked about. And Saoirse; she was too beautiful to show any interest in me. It wasn't because she was vain, it was because she didn't show any interest in anyone, much less a guy that everyone thought was emo. She was a gothic beauty who had the attitude; "Fuck the world with a capital "F"." She was the toughest person I'd ever met and didn't give a damn what the guys thought of her. It was so easy to fall for her. Being the only girl in the group, you'd think she'd get picked on, but it was the opposite. She was the only person who didn't smoke; even I started to smoke to fit in. She wasn't afraid to say no, and stand up for herself. I had even seen her beat up Jerry on one occasion. I had no idea why she hung around with Justin; I could tell she didn't like him. But then again, she didn't seem to like anyone. There was something going on between them, but no one wanted to talk about it. No one really talked to me about anything; I was on the edge of the group, the new guy. I was the new guy until the group fell apart. The group fell apart when Justin died. Justin died was 13 months ago.
Now Saoirse and I were pretty much the only people left. Justin was dead, Jerry was in rehab and Nick was in Juvy. Saoirse didn't ever talk to me anymore, not like she ever did in the first place, but it was even worse now. I think she hated me because I was Justin's cousin, and I reminded her of him. She was the one who had found his body after all. He had pulled Saoirse aside to talk to her, then he had gone to get something, Saoirse came back to talk to me, Jerry and Nick and we left the train yard. We found out that Saoirse had gone back the next day and found Justin dead in the train yard. She didn't talk about it, she just told us he was dead.
I cried at Justin's funeral, I knew he wasn't the nicest guy, but he had been my cousin after all... Saoirse didn't cry, but she did show up, unlike Nick. Jerry showed up, but he was stoned, so he acted like a retard throughout the whole ceremony and ended up being thrown out of the church.
I was in college now, but Saoirse wasn't, she had dropped out of school and wasn't about to go back. She wrote for a little magazine and lived with her parents still, unless that had changed. I doubted it; she didn't strike me as the type who liked change. I saw her once a week; we went to the same art class after school. There were only 15 people in the class but she still didn't talk to me. She hadn't even looked at me for 13 months. Sometimes I thought she had forgotten about me, but I didn't know how. I knew I would never forget about the group. I knew I would never forget her, no matter how far she pushed me away; I would still want her. I would still think about her night and day. I would still hope, I would still dream.