When the letters start to blend together
And thinking is a struggle-
A giant tug of war where
The white flag is in my hands.
All I can think about are battles
Battles and raids and gunshots,
Boundary lines where death is not and never will be
Never a lovely touchstone on a bleeding teens' broken heart
Nor to be represented by
A wilted flower, robbed of feeling
A sobbing mother?
While those ignorant breathe freely.
I wouldn't be so lucky,
For I am so acute.
These vivid thoughts run through my mind
Your laugh, which I can only imagine
Is rough around the edges
Goes on full blast in the stereo of my brain-
Desert sands wave in the heat
As I see your body collapse-
Hypothetically, oh, of course.
What would I do, if you were to die?
I, who love you so much,
I, who am marked by a bold red number,
Barely grazed by you full being
Your insightful thoughts and politeness
Are so affecting me.
I'm so cocky in my own way-
Ignoring the years and miles between us.
What of me?
I think, as I see you yet again in my minds eye-
Before you hit the ground.