My Repentance

My repentance

For the darkness inside

For the lies that I tell

The ones that protect them,

That cushion them with white softness from the hard truth

I smile, I laugh, They smile, They laugh,

I make a fool of myself to entertain them

Because otherwise they might guess, might know

That really, I am not so nice

That the person they see is an illusion

A colourful candy wrapper wrapped around a chocolate cockroach

A sickly-sweet demon waiting to emerge and devour their souls

Waiting to lick their shimmering ectoplasm from my bleeding lips

And feed their wasted corpses to the worms

I blend into the crowd, I cower under their gaze, And I hope

Hope that they won't look to close and…

And see the real me through my tattered veil of oreo half-truths.

Sometimes I wish I could be myself

But I know myself would never be excepted

I am too DIFFERENT for them to try to understand

I am truly free in only one place

In the heart of my crystal shard dream