Read and Review Please!


So, I've been kidnapped by the Russian Mafia.

I know. You don't have to say it. It sounds completely ridiculous to me too. I mean, what kind of self respecting college senior going to school in a quiet upper middle class suburb of Chicago gets herself into those situations?

The answer is none. No one in there right mind would ever be stupid enough to get kidnapped by Boris and Ivan. And I completely and totally, 100 percent agree with you. I did not sign myself up for free lessons in Russian and nine millimeter bullets.

My stupid roommate did.

The bastard. This never would have happened if he hadn't kissed me. Honestly, I've lived with him for almost three years now and has he ever felt the urge to do anything even remotely of a sexual nature? No, of course not. But of course he had to go and kiss me right when the Mafia was watching him and of course they figured I was his significant other.

Most people would.

It was that kind of a kiss.

So here I am, tied to a chair, which is such an overused ploy its ridiculous. I didn't even think they did this tying of the legs to the chair and hands behind the back crap anymore. It's dumb. And fast getting on my nerves. And chafing my skin. And on top of it all, Boris and Ivan have that look in their eye that all women can instinctively recognize and freak out over.

Can it get much worse than this?

Tell me what you think! I have a good feeling about this story, it should get fun.