Interview with the stars

Jeff Goldbloom: Well hello there you crazy fans! And welcome to a new edition of "Interview with the Stars". Today I have a few special guests, our first is Oppo Rancisis. Well hello Oppo, what are yooooooooou doing?

Oppo Rancisis: I hate that commercial, I don't drink. Anywho, I have come to recommend some really good barbers.

Jeff: Well Oppo, we were hoping to hear about you and the Jedi Council.

Oppo: Well over breakfast today, I heard Yoda talking to Mace Windu about antlers and a party. I'm sad because no one invites me to party's because I smell.

Jeff: Well maybe you should start washing your pubic hair.

Oppo: I am not pubic hair! I'm a beard, and I smell because I its my force power.

Jeff: Well get away from me you smelly pile of pubic hair, its time for our next guest.

Oppo: I'm not pubic hair! And don't I get more time to talk about other Jedi's?

Jeff: No, you killed the camera man with your stink. Our next guest is a professional slacker and prankster, say hello to Boba Fett!

Boba: Hey Jeff.

Jeff: Hi Boba. So is it true that your dad scored more on his SAT's then you?

Boba: Goddammit Jeff, how many times do I have to tell you that Jango Fett is my clone, and we do the same on EVERYTHING.

Jeff: Jeez Boba, keep your bra on.
Boba: I don't wear bras!
*Boba stands up and a bra falls out of his chest plate*
Eek! Where'd that come from?

Jeff: Haw Haw. Well now our next guest. Give a warm welcome to Captain Panaka!

Panaka: Hey Jeff, can we watch my movie now?

Jeff: Yeah, this movie stars Captain Panaka and Boba Fett.

*Movie starts with Panaka and Boba standing in front of someone's front door*

Panaka: OK Boba, this game is called Ding-Dong-Ditch. All you have to do is ring someone's doorbell, hide in the bushes, and record what they do when they come out on a camera, got it?

*Boba nods. Panaka rings the doorbell and dives into the bushes, turning on his camera*

Panaka: Boba you idiot! Don't just stand there, hide!

*Liam Neeson steps out in his underwear to face Boba Fett*

Liam: What are, fucking crazy? Its not Halloween! Come back 4 months from now and you can get some candy.

*Boba raises his arm and shoots Liam in the head with his wrist gun*

Liam: Argh!

*Liam collapses and dies*

Panaka: Ohmgosh! You killed Liam! You retard!

Boba: I thought he was coming on to me

*The tape ends*

Jeff: Right…

Panaka: So now that to entire world has seen the tape, I assume Boba will be arrested for murder and ill run away to live in Montana, where everything is legal.

Jeff: Well actually, the camera is a 2% milk carton and the only people seeing this are some squirrels.

Sean Connery: Damn!

Jeff: Wow! A Real Actor! Can I have your autograph Mr. Connery?

Sean: Actually, I was just looking for the little British actors room, were filming a scene for a movie outside your garage and all the tea makes me have to tinkle a lot.

Jeff: Down the hall and to your right. Anyway folks, that's all the time we have! Join us again next week when I meet more famous people!

*The squirrels outside look at each other, shrug, then run away and get hit by oncoming traffic*